As Fun As Homework Can Be
by Emberki
Summary: Gerard Way gets a job teaching at Frank's school, but can Frank resist the temptation of the hot young man he has to see most days. Of course, this causes a whole lot of new problems - My Chemical Romance, Frerard - written by Emily
1. Chapter 1

I sat up straight with my hands clasped in my lap in the hard, plastic chair at the centre of the headmasters' office. Once more, I felt like a school boy in trouble for something he hadn't done. Three very different pairs of eyes were focussed on me, taking in my appearance and forming their first impression of me based on it. I touched my shoulder length, black hair and brushed my long fringe out of my eyes, conscious that it was the feature they would be judging me on the most. I knew that I was young – probably too young to compete with the experience of the other contestants out in the drab, grey waiting room considering I was only twenty-two – but I was over qualified for this job, and I knew it.

"So, Mr Way, what do you think qualifies you for a job teaching at this school?"

.

I wasn't nervous at all; in fact, I was almost certain that I would be offered the job. This was my first job interview ever, but I had rehearsed my answers to no less than sixty potential questions in my room over and over again until I was perfect. I began to talk about my education; my straight As in all my qualifications here in America –including a perfect score of 36 in my ACT - and my attendance to Oxford university in England, receiving a first in my degree and graduating top of my class. I could see in their eyes that they were deeply impressed by my qualifications, despite their attempts to hide it. After I finished, they began to ask me questions to test my aptitude for this type of work.

"How would you sanction a child that has misbehaved?"

"How would you help a child that was struggling with work?"

"In what ways would you help prepare the SAT candidates for their exams?"

.

I answered their questions with ease and without hesitation, mentally thanking myself for those hours of practice I had put in to an audience of either my mother and brother, or myself in a mirror. I had no friends; I didn't need them. My work had always kept me far too busy to go out drinking, partying and taking part in other recreational activities like most of the other guys my age. It surprised me how much confidence I managed to display in front of these strangers, considering that I had never formed a relationship with anyone in my life apart from my immediate family. Growing up, I had always got on far better with adults than the immature population of my own age and people were always shocked by the amount of insight I could offer into topics considered 'adult.' I oozed charisma, although it wasn't natural at all. I had learned it straight from books about social studies and behaviour, but I had only ever applied it in formal situations such as this interview. I knew just how much eye contact to supply, just how to gesture correctly and just how to change the pitch of my voice and my intonation to keep my audience hanging on to every word that left my mouth.

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I finished answering their barrage of questions and shook all of their hands firmly before leaving the office, finally allowing a smug smile to spread across my face as I turned my back on the judges who had begun to chat amongst themselves. I closed the door and smiled reassuringly at the other nervous-looking, unemployed adults in the waiting room, knowing full well that they were all going to crack under the pressure in the office and make careless mistakes that would cost them this employment opportunity. I smiled at the receptionist on my way out, deciding that if I was going to be working here soon I should attempt to make a good impression on the staff. She smiled back, a wide, friendly and inviting smile. I noticed that she was young and typically beautiful. Her shoulder length blonde hair contrasted greatly with the deep red of her lipstick… I was completely useless in situations like this and so I bowed my head, exiting the building as quickly as possible. I intended to form as few relationships with my colleagues as possible, as they would merely act as a distraction to the job I was being paid to do. I walked home faster than normal as I wanted to tell my story to my mother and maybe my brother if he wasn't busy. I knew they would both be proud of me – they always were.

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I opened the front door and closed it quietly behind me so that it would not bang - mom hated sudden, loud noises to the extent of when they occurred she would scream and occasionally have a mild panic attack. I stood in the cream coloured hallway and unlaced my shining, black shoes before placing them neatly on the mahogany shelf, in between my mother's smaller shoes and my brother's larger pairs. Upon entering the living room, I was greeted by my mother who practically jumped up from the sofa.

"Oooh, Gerard. How did it go?" She ushered me onto one of the soft, white leather sofas and sat beside me, clasping my left hand in both of hers. I began to recount the interview, telling her exactly what they had asked and how I had responded.

"And they told me that they would call me tomorrow with their answer," I concluded after talking for 10 minutes without one interruption from my parent. "They only gave twenty candidates the opportunity to attend an interview, so hopefully I managed to make a good impression on them."

"Well, Gee, it sounds like you have this job in the bag!" she beamed, clapping her hands enthusiastically. My smile broadened and she pulled me into a short and awkward hug.

"Well I'm going to go and get changed, mom. I probably won't be back down here until dinner." She nodded at me before scuttling into the kitchen to check on the pots on the top of the oven.

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I climbed the marble stair case, gripping the ebony banister loosely, and whilst crossing the hall on the way to my room I was accosted by my brother, Mikey.

"So, how'd it go, Gee?" he asked. I told him a slightly shorter version of the one I had just recounted to my mother downstairs. His response was similar with lots of congratulating, but with a lot more hugging. Once I had managed to successfully peel him away from my body, I entered my pristine room. It was nothing like the other rooms in this black and white house. The walls were painted a deep red and were adorned with swirling, black patterns. My carpet was as black as coal, which meant it was exceptionally hard to keep clean – every speck of dust that was trodden in became immediately visible on the dark fabric. I moved across to my wardrobe that was organised by colour, and hung up my blazer. I pulled out my favourite pair of skinny jeans and an old Iron Maiden t-shirt before closing the frosted-glass doors. I removed my itchy white shirt and uncomfortable suit trousers, placing them straight into my basket of dirty clothes, and dressed myself in my more comfortable attire. Once dressed, I organised my desk a little, despite it already being immaculate. I hated mess… it made me worry. I settled down in my chair and picked up the book on French culture that I had begun to read the previous day.

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About an hour later, there was a loud knock on my door. I shouted for the person to come in and I set my book down on top of my desk; it was only Mikey. I gestured for him to come in and he lay down on my bed, sprawling over the crimson sheets. I winced as he crumpled them up.

"What do you want, Mikey?" I asked, turning my chair around to face him and wondering what I was going to have to counsel him about this time. Normally, I didn't do a very good job as I was not as interested girls or friends or games to the same extent that my brother was, but I knew he found venting his problems to me useful and relaxing as he knew I would never judge him.

"You're going to be teaching at my school, right?" He questioned, staring up at my ceiling. I nodded, becoming impatient with Mikey already; he needed to learn how to get straight to the point. "Well… what subject are you going to be teaching?"

"Well, Mikey, I've applied for a job in the English department, considering that is what my degree is in." Mikey sat up straight on my bed and looked at me with a blank expression for some seconds, his head cocked at a slight angle to the right. I was impatient enough at the best of times, but right now I was becoming overly irritated by Mikey's lack of forwardness. "Spit it out, Mikey!"

"Well… the English teachers at our school aren't exactly known for being good at… umm… controlling classes. So English has kinda become a class to fuck around in now." Mikey was biting his lip, a habit that he had picked up from me when he was young and mimicked me, a worried look now covering his thin face.

"Well… I'll just have to change that then, won't I?" Mikey was not exactly filling me with confidence at the prospect of having to control a class of hormone fuelled adolescents. "You know that I am not the kind of person that will tolerate childish behaviour."

"Ok, Gee," Mikey sighed in defeat. I shot him a warning look, his attitude infuriating me further. "Well I have quite a lot of homework to do. I'll come fetch you if I need any help. I really hope that you get the job. I'll talk to you later… have fun cleaning, or whatever you do in here." As Mikey got up to leave my bedroom he kicked a pile of my books over. I gasped as they spread across the floor, causing my brother to laugh heartily.

"I hate you!" I yelled after him as he ran to the safety of his room, locking the door behind him for good measure.

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I bent down to gather up all of the debris from Mikey's attack upon my room, collecting the books in my arms before laying them out on my bed. I placed them all in alphabetical order once more and restacked them against my wall, but then decided they would look better in the corner. I smoothed out the crumpled sheets on my bed and retreated to my chair by my desk. Mikey's attitude towards mess annoyed me somewhat. Despite this, I still loved him very dearly. I made a mental not to be kinder to my brother – he tried his hardest not to annoy me and I should recognise the effort. I kept thinking about what Mikey had said and it made me doubt my abilities. I didn't have much patience and I was not good at controlling my emotions; one downside of this was my tearfulness when I was put under excessive stress. Was I ready to take on this kind of challenge? I couldn't seem to shake the feeling that experience would be the key in a teaching role. '_But there's nothing you can't learn from a book_,' I thought in an attempt to reassure myself. I prayed that I would be given the classes with the more intelligent students in to teach so that I could have meaningful conversations with them, rather than the less academic student that, according to Mikey, simply did not want to be there. I pulled out my laptop from the bottom draw of my ebony desk and placed it on top of the wooden surface. As it booted up, I plugged the charger into the socket on the wall beside my desk and grabbed my memory stick from one of the hooks above my bed. I plugged it into the USB port and watched all one hundred and twelve of my lesson plans and power points appear on the screen.

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I opened the file that I was looking for; my introductory lesson. I scanned over the presentation, checking that all of the slides were present and rehearsing what I would say to the students. I opened some more files that contained my work sheets and task sheets to be handed out to the class; I would print these off tomorrow if I got the job. Thirty minutes later I felt thoroughly prepared and capable of delivering this lesson effectively. I checked the time on my laptop clock and was rather shocked to find out that it was already 6:32pm; it was almost dinner time. Dinner was always served at 6:45pm with no exceptions. I had never known it to be late in my entire life.

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Our family life ran to a strict schedule and had never been disrupted, with the exception of the death of my father when I was just six. He had died tragically in a car crash on the way to the hospital while my mother was giving birth to Mikey. It had always seemed unfair to me – he had been hit by a lorry driver who had been under the influence at the time. I was too young to comprehend fully what had happened and was left wondering why someone as good as my dad had lost his life, when the law-breaking lorry driver had escaped without a scratch on him. My dad was a business man, a loving husband and a caring father. He had sent me to the best elementary school in the area and greatly valued my education, constantly telling me what a brilliant mind I had. We were a perfect family, in my opinion. There were never any arguments in the house and my mother was happy every day. She still worked when my father was alive, but only part time so that she was able to pick me up from school at half past three and have dinner on the table for 6:45 when my father would walk in from work. His death hit us so suddenly that it through us off our stride for a while, especially during the weeks immediately following his passing.

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Naturally, I attended his funeral, and in between receiving sympathy from relatives that I did not want to interact with, I realised I would do anything to make him proud of me. I decided that I would not allow the effort, time and money that he had invested in me go to waste. I had to lead a perfect life, stay out of trouble and get exceptional grades, and I knew that I could do it. We mourned for about a year, but neither my mother nor I let it affect her job or my school career. By the time I was eight, mum seemed back to her normal self and was working full time, getting regular promotions in her business; Mikey was walking and talking and I had already skipped a year of school. When I reached the age of fifteen, my mother was made the manager of her firm and Mikey had gained the perfect balance of work and a social life, whereas I had had begun to isolate myself and only leave my room when it was absolutely necessary. I knew this type of behaviour was not healthy for me, but I did not care. I was happy with how I was leading my life.

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"Gee! Mikey! Dinner's ready!" My mother called up the stairs. I shut down the laptop and opened my door to see Mikey strolling across the landing in a carefree manner. I punched his arm weakly.

"That's for fucking up my room," I said. Mikey smiled and acted out that he was in great pain before hitting me back harder and racing down the stairs and into the dining room. I giggled quietly to myself. I loved Mikey so much; he was my best and only friend in the whole world and always had been.

"Mikey, stop running around like that please… it sounds like there is an elephant in the house," I heard my mother say from the dining room as I descended the stairs. Mikey was mumbling an apology as I entered the room and sat in my usual chair. Mum had made roast chicken with mashed potato, carrots, peas and broccoli tonight - it was one of my favourites. We ate in silence like any other night with it only being broken by Mikey and I saying 'thank you' at the end of the meal. Mikey hastily made an exit in order to not be roped into helping wash up. I, on the other hand, began to take all of the plates into the kitchen to help my mum.

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We talked about anything we could think of while we washed up. My mother washed the items and I dried them before putting them away in the correct drawer or cupboard. I caught up on how her career was going, even though it was the same as any other time she had told me – it was going brilliantly. Once the task was finished, I said goodnight and retreated to my bedroom even though it was barely eight o'clock. As I opened the door to my room I could hear Mikey's x-box blaring out whatever game he was on this time. I shook my head - he should be working. I turned around and returned to Mikey's doorway to warn him to 'turn it down before mom came up.' He grunted a reply through the closed door but still did as I said. I returned to my room and changed into my pyjamas before settling down in bed to read, finally falling asleep at about eleven o'clock.


	2. Chapter 2

I opened my heavy eyelids and was immediately blinded by the bright morning sunlight streaming through my partially open curtains. Blinking several times before bringing my hands up to my face, I brushed my hair out of my eyes and rubbed them until I felt more awake. I felt in a particularly good mood this morning, even though the nerves were already beginning to settle in fast. I rolled over to check the time on my alarm clock; the glowing green digits informed me that it was 10:14. I had overslept! It was very rare that I slept past half past 7 – in fact I couldn't remember the last time I had had a lie in. I sat up and stretched, loosening all the muscles that ached in my body – apparently I had fallen asleep in an uncomfortable position last night. My stomach suddenly filled with butterflies as I realised that the most important phone call of my life was going to be incoming at half past ten. With a shake of my head, I calmed myself down reasonably quickly by telling myself that there was no need to worry, as my chances of getting the job were particularly high.

.

On a normal Tuesday morning, I would have woken Mikey up at precisely 8 o'clock so that he could get ready for school and I could drive him there at half past, but today was the last day of spring break, so Mikey probably wouldn't emerge from his room before midday. On regular school days we would sing along to whatever CD was in the car – Misfits or Iron Maiden normally – and when we would reach the school, Mikey would give me a quick hug and get out of the car to meet up with his small group of friends. He was no longer friends with a lot of the people he used to hand out with because he lost interest in sports and all other typically 'laddish' activities and became obsessed with comic books and games. Not that this was a bad thing; I did not like his old friends at all anyway. They were far too arrogant and they bullied people - that was why Mikey left them. They were the typical 'popular people' that every school is unfortunate to have, and so they used their status to push people around and get their own way all the time. Their main victims used to be three boys called Bob, Ray and Frank who hung around together as a trio, but one day my brother stuck up for them, resulting in him immediately being labelled as 'gay' by the people he thought were his best friends – a concept I could never quite comprehend. Due to his act of courage, Mikey became best friends with Ray, Bob and Frank and he says that they are practically inseparable at school, but he never brings his friends home.

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My theory was that Mikey felt embarrassed by me and our mother. I loved my brother more than anyone else that had ever touched my life, but I knew that his friends would find me abnormal and Mikey couldn't risk losing his only friends because of the unusualness of this family. To begin with, I probably wouldn't interact with them properly, as social situations filled me with dread and therefore I would probably make them feel awkward. Equally, Mikey would have to explain about my problems with mess and my mother's anxiety in regards to noise so that his peers did not do anything to upset either of us. He was probably scared that his friends would mock him and I didn't blame him at all. Although our family was loving and supportive, it was not particularly mentally stable and if I had had friends in school, I probably would not have wanted to bring them back to this bleak house either. Thinking about all of the issues and situations that Mikey had to deal with made me feel guilty, but at this point there was very little that I could do to change it.

.

Although our family was rather wealthy, Mikey and I still attended public school because my mother did not want us to turn into 'posh snobs in those silly little schools.' I whined and sulked because I expected my mom to do anything that would allow me to excel in academics, but the minute that she explained that I would have to stay on campus in a dormitory with other boys I immediately dropped the subject. The fear of being bullied was too great to even consider going to a private school after my mother told me that. I could barely hold a conversation with anyone my age, let alone live with them – the thought of a shared bedroom also terrified me more than anything in the world. There was no way I would be able to cope with the amount of mess that normal teenagers can cause.

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My phone began buzzing on my bedside table; I froze, too scared to answer the call for a moment. I hesitantly reached out my shaking hand to grab the ringing cell phone. The number on the screen was the one that I had saved under 'Mikey's school.'

"Hello?" I said, my head becoming cloudy and my heart rate increasing. I could feel a panic attack brewing inside of me as my palms began to sweat.

"Hello. Is this Mr Gerard Way?" a woman's voice sounded into my ear.

"Yes, speaking."

"Hi, this is Rosie and I'm calling to inform you about the results from the interviews held for a job in the English department that you applied for. I'm the girl on reception that you smiled at on your way out."

"Oh yes, I remember," I said, smiling as I realised she remembered who I was. I was barely able to speak because my lips were shaking so much. My breathing was becoming shallower and I realised that if she kept me waiting much longer, I would break down or pass out.

"Well, I can gladly inform you that you were successful and everyone here was _very _impressed with your interview and record. So I guess I'll see you at work tomorrow, Mr Way!" Rosie exclaimed, finally breaking the good news to me. I muffled a squeal with my hand, causing her to giggle. "Are you still there, Mr Way?"

"Please, call me Gerard. Y-yeah, thank you s-so much! I shall see you tomorrow," I stammered. Rosie filled me in on where I should meet her tomorrow as she would be the one going through the welcome procedures with me. We said our goodbyes before I put my cell phone back down on my mahogany bedside table with my trembling hands. I had got the job... my first job. I started tomorrow morning and instead of going to my first lesson, I was to be given a tour of the school by Rosie. She would also go over my time table with me to ensure I knew what I would be doing all day. The first lesson that I would conduct would be in second period.

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I made my bed carefully and drew my curtains, opening my windows in the process so that the cool, refreshing, outside air could enter my room. The grin had still not faded from my face; I felt so excited! I decided that I should probably inform my family of the news so that I could make a start on preparing myself for my first day of work. After I had pulled on some clothes, I exited my room and followed the hallway until I was stood outside my brother's room. I knocked three times on the white, wooden door, and when I received no answer I decided to enter his room. The floor was completely covered in clothes and various DVD boxes, strewn carelessly all over. I managed to stifle a scream by placing my hand in my mouth and biting down on my knuckles until I tasted my own bitter blood in my mouth. I spotted my brother sprawled over his bed in just his underwear, snoring incredibly loudly.

"MIKEY! When was the last time you cleaned this room?! I can't even be in here! Outside in 5 minutes, please!" I yelled at him, the force of my outburst making him roll off the bed, startled from his slumber. He looked at me with big, tired eyes, watching me walk out of his room. He was clearly shaken by my shouting and embarrassed with the state of his room. I stood outside in the hallway trying to stop my hands from shaking. I didn't think that I was _this_ bad… I assumed I was more in control of my compulsions. My reaction to Mikey's incredibly untidy room had scared me, and had no doubt freaked my brother out too. Apparently I had been overestimating my mental health state for some time now, allowing myself to deteriorate in this practically spotless house. I tried my normal techniques of breathing slowly and even lying down – lying down always relaxed me.

.

Eventually my brother decided to come out of his room, dressed in his usual black, skinny jeans and band t-shirt. He looked at me but didn't make eye contact; instead he stared at his greying socks. I knew that Mikey always fussed over my condition, trying to cushion me from the world, and I realised that he was probably upset that he had made me react like that.

"Hey," he whispered, sitting down next to me whilst I entered into an upright position from lying on the carpeted floor. "I'm really sorry... I didn't mean to upset you." He draped his arm around my shoulder as I snuggled into his chest. I missed our cuddles; we used to watch movies together all the time, but that had stopped when he started middle school. He smelt of deodorant and cigarettes. I did not encourage Mikey's filthy habit, but at least he didn't drink – I couldn't condone alcohol consumption at all.

"It's ok," I mumbled into his shoulder, "I shouldn't have reacted like that. Anyway, I have some good news for you." I looked up into his eyes. "I got the job."

"Really! Oh, Gee, that's AMAZING! I'm so proud of you!" Due to the position that I was sat in, when Mikey's grip on me tightened I could barely breathe.

"Mikey... you're crushing me," I choked out. Mikey's arm loosened around me before he stood up and offered me his hand to pull me into a standing position too.

"Have you told Mom yet?" He asked.

"No... I was planning on going down after telling you but it seems to have taken longer than expected." Mikey blushed and looked down at his feet.

"I-I'll clean it later. Promise," he murmured, refusing to make eye contact with me again. I giggled weakly.

"I'll help you in a bit, but I have to tell mom the news first," I said, giving him a quick hug before walking down the stairs to greet my mother in the living room.

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"Good morning, honey," my mom said as I entered the living room. She stood up to kiss me on the cheek. "You're up late; would you like some breakfast?" She began walking to the kitchen, intent on feeding me something; I followed her.

"No thanks mom. I'll just have some coffee, please. I have something to tell you," I said, sitting at the kitchen table. "I got the job!" My mom turned away from the boiling kettle to look at me for some seconds, a blank expression on her face that suddenly turned into a huge smile as she threw her arms around my neck, abandoning the mugs on the counter.

"Oh my goodness, Gerard! I'm so happy for you! My baby's growing up!"

"Mom," I whined. Even though nobody could see, my mother was embarrassing me far too much.

"Oh, Gerard, I'm so proud! I would love to stay and talk about this but I have to go to work! I'll talk to you when I get home hopefully. Dinner will be at quarter to seven as usual, but I have to do some work after that so I may not have time to talk until tomorrow." She kissed me on the cheek and grabbed her bag and keys before shouting a 'goodbye' to my brother and walking out the front door. I sat at the kitchen table sipping my black coffee, thinking about how lovely it was going to be to see Rosie again tomorrow considering how friendly she had been on the day of the interview. I rethought my previous plan and decided that forming a relationship with _one _colleague couldn't hurt. Perhaps it could even improve my performance as a teacher, as she was more familiar in the environment that I was. After I finished my drink I ascended the stairs, hell-bent on forcing Mikey to clean his room.

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I knocked on the door for the second time that morning and was greeted by two bags full of trash being thrown out of the room, into the hall and into me. Mikey's head then popped around the door frame.

"Sorry... I started cleaning, but it's going to take much longer than I thought," he said, obviously proud of his efforts. I was impressed with the amount of floor that I could now see compared to earlier. I took a deep breath and stepped into the room, determined that my compulsions would not get the better of me this time.

"Well, it looks like I'm going to have to help you then." I gestured for him to sit on his bed. "Right - It's easier to clean if you put all of your items into piles first. For example, put all your clothes in a pile, all your books in a pile and so on. Ok, got it? Let's get started then." We cleaned for about two hours until I was happy with the state that Mikey's room was in, collapsing on the bed together when we had finished.

"So, Gee, are you excited about tomorrow?" Mikey asked me.

"I suppose… more nervous than excited at the moment though. I should probably go and start printing off sheets and getting my clothes out ready." I tried to get up off Mikey's bed, but he pulled me back down.

"No, Gee. You can't keep working yourself to death. Your work is amazing, okay? I'm sure you're over prepared. Can't we just stay here and chat like we used to?"

.

"Ok then, Mikey. What do you want to talk about?" I asked, sitting myself in a more comfortable position on the double bed.

"I'm confused," Mikey started, sitting up and crossing his legs. I knew that Mikey asking to talk to me meant that I had to conjure up some form of intelligent advice for my brother, so I engaged my brain and concentrated on the matter at hand.

"About what, exactly?" I prompted.

"I think I might... I don't know. Maybe I shouldn't be talking to you about this. I mean, I'm not one hundred percent sure and I know you don't have experience with things like this."

"Did you get a girl pregnant, Mikey?" I asked, my eyes practically popping out of my skull.

"No! No! Not at all! It's kind of different... I think I like... other people... people that aren't... girls." Mikey dropped his head in order to completely avoid eye contact with me.

"So you're gay?" I concluded, fed up of Mikey beating around the bush.

"N-no. I still like girls, I think. But there's this guy and... Wow. He blows my mind," Mikey breathed.

"Aw! Little Mikey's in love," I teased, causing him to go a very deep shade of red.

"Lay off me, Gee," Mikey said, nudging me slightly with his elbow. "Anyway, you're meant to be giving me advice. What should I do about this guy? I mean, I know that he's into guys because he's out... but I don't know how he feels towards me. We're best friends, but I don't know if he feels anything more towards me..."

"Ooh! Is It Frank?" Mikey only had 3 best friends, so it _had_ to be one of them, and from what I had seen of Frank he could be quite feminine at times.

"No! I mean, Frankie _is_ gay, but he is definitely not 'out and proud.' In fact, I don't think he could be any further in the closet," Mikey said, giggling slightly.

"Ray then?" I asked, attempting to guess his crush again.

"Umm... well..." Mikey went an even deeper shade of red – I didn't think that was possible.

"Mikey, is there anyone in your group that's _not_ gay?"

"Well, Bob's as straight as they come. But he knows about Frank and Ray's sexualities." My brother responded. "It's just kind of a coincidence that all the gay kids ended up in one group, I guess."

"Well to be honest, I think you should go for it Mikey. Even if it doesn't work out, you two are such close friends that I don't think you would fall out over it. It's worth a shot, isn't it?"

"I guess... Thanks, Gee. You always know how to help me. You're so smart." Mikey always gave me compliments on my intelligence, but I never accepted them; I had far too little self esteem for that.

"No I'm not, Mikey, and we both know that. I'm qualified… that's all. Anyway, if you'll excuse me I have a lot of work to do."

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The rest of my evening passed by uneventfully; I printed off all of the sheets that I would need for tomorrow, I ate dinner with my family, I helped mum to wash up and I spent the rest of the night in my room trying unsuccessfully to fall asleep. My mind was buzzing with excitement and anxiety, refusing to let me fall into a world of dreams. Eventually, at around midnight, I did manage to enter into a light slumber, waking up when my alarm clock rang ominously at seven o'clock exactly.


	3. Chapter 3

I sat up suddenly in my bed when I remember that it was this morning that I would be starting my new job. The butterflies in my stomach were uncontrollable, the mix of anxiousness and excitement too much for me to cope with this early in the morning. I stood up and stretched before heading to the bathroom to take a quick shower, brush my teeth and shave. After rushing through my morning routine, I returned to my room and walked over to my wardrobe. I opened the doors and flicked through the variety of clothes hanging up, grabbing the items that I needed. I retrieved a black shirt, black suit trousers, a red tie and one of my many black blazers before grabbing a pair of boxers out of my drawer. I threw the towel that had been tied around my waist onto the bed, shivering as the crisp morning air touched my body, and began to get dressed. I watched myself in the mirror as I adjusted my tie, making sure that my outfit was crease-free and completely clean. I brushed my hair quickly and hoped that it wouldn't look _too_ unprofessional when it had dried. Glancing at my clock, I noticed that it was already eight o'clock – time to try and wake Mikey up.

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"Mikey! Get up now!" I shouted, knocking on his door relentlessly until I was sure that he had heard me. "I'll be back here in half an hour for you to come to the car and if you're not ready, I will be leaving you here and you can walk to school instead," I threatened. I realised that the reason I was being so harsh towards him was probably because I was so nervous, so I softened my tone. "Do you want me to make you some coffee?" I pressed my ear to the door and heard him grunt in response - I interpreted the incoherent grumble as a 'yes.' I trudged down the stairs, taking care not to leave fingerprints on the shining banister and quickly looked around the empty, pristine living room. As I entered the kitchen, the smell of toast hit me and I realised that mom had already gone to work, but I found a note taped to the side of the kettle in her hand writing.

'_I hope you have a good first day today, Gee! Go out there and teach those kids some proper English. Lots of love, Mom xox'_

I smiled and folded the paper up, placing it in my blazer pocket before clicking the kettle on to boil. Once I had poured the scolding water into the two cups Mikey walked into the room, his eyes still half closed, and collapsed into a chair at the kitchen table. Miraculously he was already completely dressed, even if his hair was still a complete mess.

"Are you a little tired, Mikey?" I asked in a light, carefree tone, knowing full well that this was the earliest Mikey had been awake for the past week.

"Fuck off," he mumbled in response, resting his head on the kitchen counter. I passed his coffee over to him and he practically snatched from my hand, groaning into the mug.

"Make sure you brush your hair before you leave," I lectured. He grumbled a quiet 'fuck you' before adding a 'thank you' for the coffee as I exited the room to go and check my bag. I knew that I had put everything I would need in it last night, but I needed to check – I couldn't bear the thought of showing up to my first lesson without all my resources.

.

Eventually, Mikey and I got into my car and drove towards the school. It was only a fifteen minute drive, but Mikey would rather die than walk that far on his own. The journey was strangely silent for the first ten minutes, before Mikey decided to speak.

"So, Gee, Are you excited?" Mikey asked, checking his hair and eye liner in the wing mirror.

"Yes, I think. What about you?"

"Me? Why should I be excited?" Mikey asked, looking perplexed.

"Well, you're going to admit your feelings to Ray today, aren't you?" I asked, astonished that such an important decision had slipped Mikey's mind.

"Oh yeah..." Mikey mumbled, staring out of the car window.

"Nervous?" I pressed, keeping my eyes straight ahead on the road.

"A little… I don't know what to say to him, Gee. I'm not used to things like this. What if he rejects me?" He was wringing his hands in his lap. I felt sorry for him - this was a scenario that he had never been in before. But Mikey was brave… braver than me. "It will be so awkward if he does… I don't even know if they would let me keep hanging out with them."

"Mikey, it's just like asking out a girl and you've done that before... a lot. As for him liking you, you're very likeable - it's almost guaranteed that he will be into you Mikey. You know full well that those three boys think the world of you and they wouldn't let their friendship be destroyed by something as trivial as a crush. Anyway, we're here now."

.

I hugged my little brother before we got out of the car, both of us whispering '_good luck_' in the other's ear. I shut the door, put the strap of my black messenger bag on my shoulder and walked towards the reception area, forcing myself to feign confidence already. I watched carefully as Mikey walked over to his friends and smirked at the way that Ray checked my brother out whilst Frank jumped on him.

"Mr Way?" a feminine voice said from behind me. I turned around quickly to see Rosie stood there, smiling from ear to ear.

"Hi, Rosie," I said, looking at the bridge of her nose rather than into her sparkling blue eyes. I wasn't too good at eye contact on a personal level. "I thought I said that you should call me Gerard." She giggled.

"Oh yes, I'm sorry, Gerard. Anyway, shall we go and find somewhere quiet to go through your time table? I think that the meeting room across from the reception will be free… shall we go?" She asked. I nodded my head in response. As I walked through the glass, double doors, I turned and looked across the school yard to see Mikey and Ray standing away from their group – they seemed to be deep in conversation and Ray's grin was almost as big as his hair. Following Rosie through the building, I began to smile to myself. I hoped that they would get together - they would make a perfect couple.

.

"So," Rosie began. "The rooms you're going to be in are 07, 13 and 01. 01 and 07 are in the English corridor here," she gestured to the map of the school that was in front of me. "And room 13 is way over here in the History block… but you're only in there for five lessons a week. Your two free periods are last thing on a Friday and last thing on a Tuesday. It says which years you have here and what kind of level they generally are here." Rosie was carelessly jabbing her French manicured nails at the paper, and I was trying to keep up with the information she was giving me. Luckily, I managed to retain almost all of it – that's what years of enhancing your memory achieves.

"Okay, I think I've got that. Now, where are the photocopying machines and other important things that I may need to use?" I asked, knowing that I would need to do a great deal of printing over the time I would be working here.

"Well, there's one in reception and one up in the library," she pointed at the map once more. "There is also a small, staff work room next to the reception with computers that you can use to print things. If it's full though you can always use the computers in the library. Also, don't worry about using a lot of paper, they never mind here. I know that some schools put limits on the amount of paper that you can use per week. What school did you work at before this?" She asked me.

"Umm… This is my first job… ever." I mumbled in response, letting my façade drop for a moment. A look of shock spread across her angelic features which she quickly suppressed.

"You're serious? Wow. I thought that – Well… with the way you act and how professional you are I thought that you must have had at least _one_ teaching job in the past."

"No, I just spent a lot of time studying, reading and preparing myself for situations like this." I hadn't, however, prepared myself for intimate, personal conversations and it definitely showed – the atmosphere was excessively tense, or so I thought. Rosie didn't seem notice my lack of skills in this area and instead tried even harder to engage me in a full conversation.

"Oh, so you're super book-smart?" I nodded, causing her to become interested in just how much I knew. We talked for a while, her firing questions at me whilst I tried to keep up. For some reason, this conversation seemed more intimidating that the interview I had taken part in to get this job. "What's the time?" She asked to no one in particular, breaking our lengthy conversation and looking at the clock behind my head. "Gosh… We have ten minutes left of period two – you'll be teaching your first lesson in period three. I'll show you the classrooms you'll be working in first."

.

I gathered up all the sheets of paper that she had given me and followed her through the maze of corridors, all the time attempting to keep track of where I was. Occasionally, we would pass another teacher, Rosie would introduce me and I would shake them by the hand and say how 'lovely it was to meet them.' In all honesty, I was not thrilled to meet them as now we had been introduced, I would be required to interact with them within the school day. Rosie would smile at me reassuringly every once in a while and I would smile back in a carefree manner – effectively hiding my true feelings of nausea due to anxiety.

.

"So, this is you: room 07. You have a class of eighth graders now and trust me, they're a lovely group. They're ever so polite and helpful around the school. But remember, if you have any trouble don't hesitate to set detentions or send them down to reception to be dealt with. Don't let anyone walk all over you! I'll see you later!" she concluded, turning on her bright pink high-heels and walking down the dull, grey corridor, swinging her black-skirt clad hips. Suddenly, the bell rang. It was loud and had a sort of nails-down-a-blackboard effect to it. It startled me and my heart began to beat in my chest so loud I felt like the sound could have been heard all echoing through all the winding corridors. The hallway began to fill with rambunctious students jostling past each other in a race to their corresponding classrooms. I silently slipped through the door of 07, away from the overwhelming atmosphere outside, and waited for the crowds outside to disperse. I took in the environment and saw that it was immaculate – this was how it would stay as long as I was in this room.

.

Once the space outside my room had quietened down considerably, I opened the door once more to see my class stood in what resembled a line.

"Ok, class!" I said, raising my voice and shocking even myself with the amount of confidence in it. "We're going to go in and I'm going to let you sit where you want to, but be warned: if you talk too much, I will move you into another seat – I'm going to trust you guys. Right, in you go!" The class filed into the room and sat down reasonably quickly and quietly. I was glad that this was my first class – as Rosie had said, they seemed like a lovely group. I instructed them to take out their school equipment and proceeded to attempt to learn some of their names. One of the girls at the front, Gracie, offered to hand out the books as I didn't know everyone's names and her friend Amy asked if I would like her to hand out the sheets. Once they had completed their tasks I opened my PowerPoint and began what I had been preparing for years.

"Ok, hello eighth grade. I'm Mr Way and I will be your new English teacher for the rest of the school year. I will be collecting your books in at the end of the lesson so that I can see what you have already covered with your previous teacher. The first thing that I would like you to do is read the top of the sheet that Gracie handed out."

"_Amy_!" the two girls at the front shouted in unison.

"Sorry! I guess I'm going to get you two girls mixed up all the time, aren't I! I assume you're best friends?" They both nodded, giggling as their cheeks became flushed with colour. I smiled at them as they began to read the sheet in front of them. I turned to my PowerPoint and flicked to the next slide which contained the text that was at the top of their work sheet. Once I saw that all of the students were looking up at the board again, I began to talk.

"I would like you all to write me a letter about yourself so that I can get to know you a bit more. On the board in a minute there will be an example letter about me to for any of you that are a bit confused what you need to do." Immediately, the children set off writing in their books. I clicked the mouse once to bring up the next slide on the screen.

"_Dear eighth graders,_

_ My name is Mr Way and I am twenty two. I am your new teacher for the rest of this school year and I am looking forward to meeting you all. I enjoy drawing, writing and especially reading! My favourite book is Magician by Raymond E. Feist and my favourite films have to be horror films! I am also very interested in reading academic books on a wide variety of topics, such as behaviour, culture, physics and many more. This is a VERY short version of the letter that you will be writing for me right now, but I hope that this gave you some ideas as to what to write. Just talk about what you personally like to do – I'm sure you're all very interesting and individual!_

_I look forward to hearing from you all,_

_Mr Way."_

_._

I watched as they wrote, occasionally being asked to write a word on the board if someone couldn't spell something, but on the whole they seemed to be a serene, hardworking class. I smiled to myself and grabbed my time table from the top draw of my desk where I had put it. I checked what class I would be taking after break – a junior class in this room. I wondered how they would be. All I knew was that Mikey wasn't in this class as he was in a class of students with higher grades, which I had on Thursday, so I froze the screen of the projector and turned to the computer. I clicked on my register to find a class list. A few names popped out at me: Charlie smith (The boy that broke Mikey's glasses that one time), Cassie Richardson (The girl that cheated on Mikey in ninth grade) and Frank Iero. I smiled to myself briefly. At least there was _someone_ nice in that class. When I looked up from the computer screen I noticed that the class were engaging in quiet conversation with each other.

"Okay, are you all finished?" I asked. A few of them nodded at me and the rest just stared – I took that as a yes. "Well, I have one final task for you to do and then I want to talk to you for five minutes at the end about some classroom rules. I'd like you all to do a spider diagram about what you already know about 'persuade, argue, and advise' as that will be our first topic – I understand that you have already started some basic work on this topic with your previous teacher. You've got ten minutes to do that in pairs."

.

Once their ten minutes were up and everyone looked like they had reasonably full spider diagrams in their books, I stopped them.

"Now, before I collect the books in, I'd like to just set some classroom rules. Firstly, I don't want _too_ much chatting while you're working, but you seem to be very good at keeping the classroom at a suitable volume level already. Secondly, I need you to keep your places tidy because I really, really like things to be neat and tidy - so no gum on the bottom of desks, no rubbish dropped on the floor and no writing on the desks. And finally, I want you all to know that I'll be in here for an hour after school each day for anyone who's having trouble with their work. I'll always be here to help with anything you need. Okay, well that's it I think… you can all put your chairs under your desks and stand behind them until the bell goes." The pupils began to talk amongst themselves again, not too loud but not particularly quietly either; my mother would hate to be in here with all the background droning. I walked down each aisle, collecting the purple books from the desks and placing them in a neat pile on my desk; I planned to read through their letters this evening when I got home.

.

The bell rang, not making me jump as much as it had done this morning - maybe it wouldn't take me as long as I had speculated to get used to the world of work. I followed the children out of the classroom door and walked briskly down the corridor towards reception to tell Rosie all about my first lesson, a smile fixed on my face. My confidence in my abilities had returned.


	4. Chapter 4

"So, how was it?" Rosie asked immediately when I entered the reception area. She was perched behind her desk and had already begun to eat her sandwich. I noticed that she ate very slowly and delicately - it looked somewhat odd as she was curling her lips so that her bubble-gum pink lipstick wouldn't smudge.

"It was _amazing_," I breathed. "They were so quiet and lovely! There were two girls in particular who were ever so helpful, but none of them were any trouble for me at all. It was so much easier than I expected it to be - I think I'm really going to enjoy this job!" She beamed at me and gestured for me to sit in the chair next to her behind the desk. I accepted the seat gratefully.

"So, what did you bring for lunch?" she asked, making polite conversation.

"Um… my mom packed me some ham salad sandwiches this morning."

"Aww," she cooed. I blushed, remembering that grown men did not usually have their lunches packed by their mothers.

"She was making my brother lunch, so she made me some at the same time," I gushed, trying to justify myself.

"I love ham salad. I had chicken-mayo today though – only thing that I had in the fridge." She giggled in a girly, high pitched tone - it made me smile, setting me at ease once more. "What class do you have after lunch?"

"A senior class… I recognise the names of a few people in there and it seems like a… well, let's just say I think it may be one of the harder classes to keep under control."

"You know Charlie, hmm?" I nodded, knowing that she had realised that I was not looking forward to taking that class. "They're not all bad, you know. Frank Iero and Shannon Nicholson are good kids; they're really quiet."

"Frank is very close to my brother and from what I've heard he seems like a lovely kid. I'm sure I'll be fine if I find a way to keep them on task and not let them get on top of me." The bell rang as she giggled. I scowled to myself. The ringing noise seemed to annoy me more and more every time I heard it.

.

I bid farewell to Rosie and I left the reception area, picking up my bag and walking back to my classroom quickly. The corridors were once again overflowing with hyper children dashing around for no reason. I pushed through the crowds, hoping the class would be gentle with me, considering that I still looked like the kind of kid the more burly guys would beat up in the parking lot after school. The closer I got to the classroom the more of the group I could see. The majority of the students were the same height or taller than me and they were crowded around in a circle close to the door. As I got nearer, I could hear Charlie's deep voice.

.

"Fag!" he shouted. "Look at me when I'm talking to you. You're too fucking dumb to be in this class. Why don't you fuck off back you your other gay friends? No one wants you here… you're scum." I saw him spit at someone, but I couldn't see who as there too many people were crowded around.

"Excuse me," I said, attempting to sound authoritative but failing miserably.

"Hey," said Charlie, turning to face me and narrowing his eyes. "You're that Way kid's older brother. Why're you here?" He squared up to me and it took all my will to prevent myself turning on my heels and fleeing.

"Well right now I'm Mr Way and I will be your teacher from now on – so if you would all like to make your way inside and choose a seat without a fuss, I would be very grateful." They all seemed stunned that I was going to be teaching them and they entered the room reasonably silently; I knew this control would not last very long. I took a deep breath and let it out slowly, proud of myself for remaining in control of the situation. I looked and saw that the person that they had been calling a 'fag' was Frank and he looked positively distraught.

.

"Hey, Frank. Are you okay?" I asked tentatively. He shook his head violently, one tear escaping from his eyes which he wiped away swiftly, avoiding looking at me. "Are you going to be okay to sit through the lesson? I'm sure it would be fine for you to sit out if you want."

"No it's fine… I'm used to it. I don't want to cause a fuss, it's not worth it. They'll just be even more awful to me if I get them in trouble. I deserve most of what they do to me anyway." At that moment all I could see was a broken, little boy stood in front of me that I couldn't fix. I didn't have the skills to deal with situations like this and it left me feeling completely useless. "I don't normally cry either 'cause it's a daily thing for me. I guess it's just because it's the first day back and all. I had the whole of spring break practically free of this… I'm sorry," he mumbled, not lifting his head up.

"It's fine, Frank," I replied. "And you definitely don't deserve any of this… no one does. If you need me, I'm always here and happy to talk to you." He smiled shakily – it wasn't at all convincing. Taking a deep breath, I followed him into the rowdy classroom, intent on taking charge of the lesson.

"SO…!" I shouted to get their attention. "Considering you're seniors, I'm just going to introduce myself and then we'll dive straight into the lesson. I'm Mr Way and I'm new here, as you've probably guessed. So… shall we make a start on this poetry module?" The class erupted into groans and many people began to talk amongst themselves, completely ignoring that I was stood at the front of the classroom attempting to teach a lesson. I realised that this was going to be hard as even _I _could not stand poetry. I had read books and books by Poe, Frost and Dickenson, but I hadn't enjoyed a single second of it. The pretentious language just made no sense to me – I much preferred a good novel. Suddenly, I had a brain wave.

.

"Who struggles with poetry?" A couple of solitary hands were tentatively raised in the air. "Be honest please, guys," I pressed, putting my own hand in the air. "If_ I'm_ being honest, it was my worst area at school." The entire class then raised their hands. "Is it the way the ideas are phrased that is the problem?" The class nodded. "So would it make more sense if it was written in simpler terms?" they nodded again - this was going far better than I had expected. "Well, we'll translate them then! Frank, could you please hand out these poetry anthologies?" Reluctantly, Frank walked to the front, grabbed the pile of books and placed one in front of each member of the class.

.

I read the first poem aloud and then proceeded to get the class to translate it into what they thought that it all meant. The end product was impressive and the class seemed to be more subdued.

"Does it make more sense now, guys?" They all nodded in unison. "Okay, well for the rest of the lesson I'd like you to translate the next poem in the book please. Jenifer, could you please hand these books out?" I wandered around the desks, answering any questions that arose before finally reaching Frank, who was sat in the back corner of the classroom on his own. "How are you feeling?" I asked.

"Better, thanks. You're doing an amazing job. No one has ever been able to control this class and you've done it in less than an hour, sir."

"It's strange hearing you kids call me sir, but I can't wait to make Mikey do it tomorrow." Frank giggled – smiling genuinely. It was infectious and made me smile back at him. "I'm glad you feel a bit better now, Frank, but my offer still stands. I'd like to help if you'll allow me." He nodded and I walked back to the front of the classroom.

.

"Okay, guys, the bell is about to go, but I just wanted to say that apart from the start, you were rather good and hardworking this lesson. Oh, and I'm going to be here every day after school for an hour if you need me and every Friday I will be dedicating the hour to specifically helping this grade." The bell rang half way through my sentence, so I was pretty sure that no one had heard my announcement.

.

The last period of the day passed uneventfully and before I knew it the bell was chiming, signifying the end of the school day. I packed up my work and strolled out into the reception area, feeling happy and with a sense of accomplishment. Rosie was in the middle of a conversation with one of the art teachers about a child not attending lessons and I didn't want to disturb them, so I waited in the door way until they were finished. I then strolled up to her.

"Hi," I said. She jumped a little.

"Oh, Gerard! You made me jump! Are you ready to go now?"

"Yes if that's okay - I mean, if I don't have to stay here and do anything. I've got all my work to take home, so can I go?" I asked, scuffing my shoes awkwardly against the carpet. I immediately stopped when I realised how unprofessional I must have looked. Rosie giggled.

"You don't have to ask permission you know, Gerard. You do have free will in this place." I felt myself blushing faintly and I hung my head so that my hair could cover my cheeks.

"Okay then. I guess I'll see you tomorrow," I mumbled, eventually looking up into her warm, blue eyes.

"Okidoki Mr Way. I'll see you in the morning."

.

Leaving the reception, I saw Mikey already leaning against the bonnet of my car, looking rather pleased with his self.

"So, how did it go with Ray?" I asked, unlocking the door and letting us both in. I buckled up my seatbelt and made a point of waiting until Mikey did the same, earning myself an exaggerated eye roll in the process.

"It was absolutely _amazing_!" Mikey was practically bouncing up and down in his seat. "It was really awkward to begin with, but I kinda' just asked and he, like, said yes!"

"I'm proud of you, Mikes," I said, using the nickname from our childhood. I started the car engine and began to drive us home. "How did Frank and Bob react when you told them?"

"Well Bob isn't one to show much excitement, but he did give us a big man hug, and Frankie was even more energetic than usual. I think he's lonely though. He was acting kind of weird when I saw him in maths… kind of distant."

"He was upset in English… some guys were picking on him an-"

"Again?!" Mikey Yelled, slamming his fist on the dash board - I jumped, almost swerving the car off the road. "Those motherfuckers need to lay off Frank. They don't even know half of the problems they cause."

"What do you mean?" I enquired, intrigued as to why Mikey was getting so wound up over this.

"Frankie would barely even come out during spring break 'cause he was so fucking _scared_ of people beating the shit out of him. Why didn't he tell me, Gee? We're meant to be best friends." Mikey calmed down a little and started to fiddle with the strap of his seatbelt.

"Maybe he doesn't want to worry you, Mikes. You know, mom is on a business trip this weekend, and I'm sure that you and I could organise a sleepover for you, Ray, Frank and Bob if you wanted."

"Really, Gee? Oh that would be amazing! Can we sleep downstairs? 'Cause then we can watch movies on the big TV and there'd be more room." Mikey was back to his rambling self again.

"We'll see. Let's check with mom if it's okay first," I replied as we pulled into the drive.

.

I grabbed my bags from the boot of the car before locking it and walking into the house. My mother was already stood at the doorway, waiting to pounce on me and ask me a tonne of questions.

"Hey, sweetie," she started, kissing my cheek. "How was your first day?" She ushered me into the living room, only pausing to let me take off my shoes and place them neatly on the rack.

"Unreal," I breathed, sitting down and realising that I had made it through the day without one glitch.

"So… are you going to expand on that?" She asked, smiling at me and clasping my hand in hers as I began to tell her the story of my day.

.

"Mom, could Mikey have a sleepover when you're on your business trip?" I asked once I had finished my tale.

"I don't know, Gee. I don't really know his friends and I'm not going to be here if anything goes wrong…"

"I'll be here, mom. I'm Frank's teacher and I've heard a lot about Ray and Bob. They're good kids. I promise I won't let them burn the house down or anything."

"No drinking," She said, looking at me sternly.

"Naturally," I said, smiling and standing up. "Well if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go and tell Mikey the good news." As I walked away I smiled to myself - Mikey was going to be very happy. I jogged up the stairs and into my room to change into more comfortable attire, stopping to stare at myself in the mirror. _Mr Way_… such an alien phrase. I was used to being called 'Mrs Way's son' or 'That smart kid that never says anything', or even 'Mikey's brother.' However, now I saw a new man in the mirror - A more confident man… an intelligent man… a man ready to take on the world after all these years of solidarity.

.

I thought of Rosie and how glad I was that I had met her. I thought of the gleam she got in her eye when she saw me and the way she changed her body language. Was this what true friendship was meant to be? Becoming instantly comfortable and relaxed in the presence of someone? I had never had a proper friend before, only Mikey. Not that that was a bad thing, but maybe I had missed out on so much by being the anti-social kid that only left the house to go to school. Perhaps now I could make friends. Friends in the work place that I could socialise with at break times and lunch times, and that I could compare teaching strategies with; I smiled at the thought.

.

Once I was fully dressed, I walked across to Mikey's room and rapped on the door.

"Yeah," Mikey said as he opened the door, a pen in his mouth and his maths book in his hand.

"Homework already?" I asked.

"Don't even talk to me about it 'cause it's pissed me off. What do you want?"

"That's not the way to talk to someone who comes bearing good news!" I exclaimed, pouting playfully at my brother.

"She said yes?"

"Obviously." Mikey's face erupted into the biggest smile I had seen in a while and he emitted a loud, whooping noise and punched the air.

"Mikey!" Mom called from downstairs. "Be **quiet** please!"

"Sorry mom!" He yelled back, causing my mother to walk away mumbling to herself about how "noisy and reckless" Mikey was and how he "doesn't care about her nerves."

"So do you want to come to my room and plan when you have finished your work?" I asked, already walking back down the hallway.

"Sure thing, bro. I'll be with you in, like, half an hour."

.

"So… how do we do this?" I asked. I had no experience in planning sleepovers, so I was relying on Mikey's knowledge to get me through this planning session.

"Well, normally we just tell them to come here at a certain time. We tell them if they're going to have dinner here and then we tell them when they have to go in the morning. Then they tend to ask what they need to bring and you… umm… tell them." Mikey had got a notebook settled on his bony knees and was chewing the end of his pen thoughtfully. "What time do you want them here?"

"Shall we say 5pm? Mom will have been gone for a few hours and so that'll give us chance to set up the living room, right?"

"Right," Mikey replied, jotting it down. "And what are we doing about food?"

"Well, I could cook if you wanted? I was reading this great recipe book and it had such an interesting recipe for Bolognese… I was thinking I'd like to test it out some ti-"

"Gerard," Mikey said, cutting me off mid-ramble. "Normal people order take-out - Pizza or Chinese?"

"Let's go for pizza. What toppings?" I asked.

"Frankie's vegetarian, so just plain old margarita I think. What time are we kicking them out in the morning?"

"Mom's back at 6pm," I began, calculating in my head how long it would take to clean up. "So shall we say about midday?"

"Perfect. We can sort out films and snacks and junk like that later, but shall I go text the guys now and ask if they can come?"

"Go for it," I said, grinning as Mikey left the room with his phone in hand. I was glad that Mikey finally felt comfortable enough to invite his friends round, even if they weren't going to meet our mom. I still wasn't sure how I was going to cope with a house full of messy teenage boys, but if I could handle the kids at school I could cope with Mikey's friends… as long as I didn't make the atmosphere too awkward.


	5. Chapter 5

The rest of the week passed as a blur of introductions, lessons, marking books9 and lunch times with Rosie. Despite the fact that there was a perfectly good, clean staff room in the building, I always spent my lunches sat at the reception desk with Rosie. We had got to know each other reasonably well by the end of the week and my awkward episodes were becoming less and less frequent. I seemed to get on with her exceptionally well and I looked forward to seeing her every day. As for my other classes, I was pleasantly surprised to learn that they were all lovely kids – there were however a few exceptions. Teaching Mikey's class was surreal because my brother was just sat there and I couldn't give him special attention… it was hard not to focus on him for the entire lesson. I had set homework and genuinely looked forward to coming home and marking it, seeing how the kids were progressing. I was adapting well to work life, despite my previous fears. I still avoided unnecessary interaction with other staff and sometimes I became a bit overwhelmed when my class became noisy, but there was never anything I couldn't deal with.

.

It was Saturday before I knew it and Mikey was bounding around the house with nervous energy, excited that his friends were going to be round later that day. I was lying on the sofa watching a documentary about lions on the TV while Mikey rushed around, getting ready to go out.

"Five hours and thirty minutes, Gee!" he exclaimed, grabbing his black converse and stuffing his feet into them. "Can we go rent some films now please?"

"Mikey, I'm tired," I grumbled, turning the TV off and looking up at him. "I've been up all night marking Frank's class' homework; please don't make me go out!"

"You _promised_," he whined. Mikey had been getting on my nerves all day; I couldn't understand what was quite so exciting about having friends round for the night… but then again, his boyfriend was going to be there. I smiled at the thought and hauled myself upright.

"Are we getting horror films or some slushy, romantic trash for you and Ray?" I asked, smirking a little at my brother – it earned me a sharp elbow to the rib. "Fine, I'm getting up. Just stop pestering me!" I yanked on my coat and shoved my feet into my shoes, locking the door behind us before heading towards the car where Mikey was already stood.

.

Upon arriving at the DVD rental store, Mikey made a beeline for the horror section; rolling my eyes, I put my head down and followed him, carefully manoeuvring myself through the aisles towards him.

"Hey," someone suddenly said to me, startling me a little. I looked up and was greeted by the warm, bright white smile of Rosie who drew me into a hug before I could even react; my arms stuck out at awkward angles, not sure of what I had done to deserve a hug, but after a second I hugged her back. "Looking for something to watch?" she asked.

"Not for me, for my brother, Mikey. He's over there in the horror section," I gestured vaguely in his direction. "He's having a sleepover tonight and he's been pestering me all morning to drive him down here. I'm sure he could have walked if he was so bothered."

"You look a lot alike; does he go to our school?"

"Yes," I replied. "He's a senior."

"Is he going away to college after this year?"

"He's not sure. To be quite honest, I hope he doesn't," I said, unintentionally projecting my thoughts out loud.

"Really?" she asked, cocking her head to the side a little. "Most people are glad to get rid of their siblings."

"Oh, no – I love Mikey to bits. He's my best friend!" I protested. "I just don't want him to leave me here alone, I guess."

"Awh, that's _so_ cute," she said, grinning at me and touching my arm. "Well, I have to go. I'll see you Monday, okay?"

"Of course – Monday in the reception," I replied faltering momentarily as she kissed me on the cheek before regaining my composure. She smiled sweetly at me and proceeded to leave the store.

.

"Was that Rosie?" Mikey said smugly, slinking over to me with a large grin on his face.

"Yes. Wait - that's Miss Nightingale to you, Mikey! She should be treated like the other staff." I said sternly.

"Nah, she lets us call her Rosie. But anyway, why is she going round kissing creepy English teachers?"

"Mikey! I'm not creepy!" I protested, staring at him with wide eyes. I felt myself become increasingly anxious and I just wanted to go home. "She's my friend, if you must know. Can we just drop this please? Have you chosen your damn DVDs yet?"

"Friend… okay," Mikey said, his sly smile still on his face. "And yes, I've chosen my DVDs and I've also rented them, so we can go now." I sighed gratefully and followed Mikey out of the shop, mumbling under my breath.

"She is my friend."

"Yeah, right." I shot Mikey a stern look and he eventually dropped the subject. So, how's your job going anyway?" He asked, taking bouncy steps beside me as I strode back towards the parking lot.

"I love it so much. It's seriously one of the best things that I've done in my life and although it is a bit scary to have to stand up in front of all those kids, it's so worth it. I like knowing that I'm helping people. Making them intelligent… it's a nice feeling. How is your relationship going?"

"Hmm? Oh, Ray. It's pretty non-existent at the moment." Mikey chuckled nervously.

"What do you mean?"

"Oh… it's just that he's a bit reluctant to do anything. For example, I'll try and hold his hand and he'll giggle a bit then wriggle free. I think he's a bit shy, to be honest." I grinned at Mikey who was going a nice shade of pink.

"That's so cute!" I exclaimed, pinching his cheeks before getting in the car to avoid being punched.

.

"Four hours, Mikey! _Four hours_! Are you excited?" I asked, jumping up and down to mimic Mikey's earlier excitement.

"Don't mock me, Gee," he replied, throwing one of the cushions from the sofa at me.

"I'm not the one watching the clock like a hawk! You need to calm down a bit or you'll wear yourself out before your friends even arrive. How about we make a list of what we need to do?" I asked eagerly, sitting up and reaching for my notebook and pen.

"Not one of your lists, Gerard! You're such a fucking organisation freak!"

"But it'll be fun! So, we need to get the sleeping bags down from the attic; move the sofa's back so there's room in front of the TV; put snacks in bowls and put them on the coffee table and I need to do some more marking and lesson planning."

"That has nothing to do with me," Mikey said flatly, flicking the TV on.

"No, but you can start by cleaning your room! I went in earlier to fetch your English book to mark your work and I nearly had a heart attack! It's been less than a week, Mikey. How did it get that messy again?! Clean it up now!" I yelled, scowling as Mikey began to giggle at me. "It's not funny, Mikey. I don't understand you at all." With that, he left the room giggling to himself. I sighed – Mikey was so weird.

.

It was 4:55pm and Mikey was stood by the window, staring out into the dim street and flinching at every sign of movement he saw. He had reluctantly cleaned his room and I had set out the living room perfectly – four sleeping bags around the TV with mountains of cushions and pillows lying around. There were bowls upon bowls of snacks on the coffee table and I had left two bottles of soda in the kitchen with four glasses. The popcorn was in the microwave ready so all Mikey had to do was turn it on when they were ready. I was proud of what I had accomplished and looked across the living room with delight.

"Mikey, I'm going to go upstairs and do some work… I don't want to make your friends uncomfortable when they arrive. I'll come down at about seven to order some pizza for you guys if that's okay," I asked. I smiled softly when Mikey nodded silently, biting his nails and still not taking his eyes of the window. "Have fun, okay? I'm just upstairs if you need me for anything."

"I'm not a fucking child, Gerard. Stop babying me. I can cope with a fucking sleepover, which is more than you could ever do," he snapped, moving his eyes away from the window for a second to glare at me.

"Fine," I eventually replied, hurt by Mikey's outburst. "I've done all of this for you because I just wanted you to be happy, but you obviously don't appreciate it at all. Have a nice fucking evening, Mikey," I spat back, storming up the stairs. I couldn't believe he had the cheek to be like that towards me when all I wanted to do was help. I just wanted him to have a perfect sleepover with his friends so he could be a normal kid. It was ridiculous.

.

Upon reaching my room, I pulled out my laptop and began to plan lessons, listening to Mikey's friends arriving. Bob was the first to arrive, then Frank, then Ray. I could hear them all chatting and giggling through the ceiling - why did I have to sit in my room feeling worthless and unappreciated while Mikey had a good time with his friends? I felt angrier than before. Suddenly it dawned on me that mum was out, so I could put my music on as loud as I fucking wanted. I put the first CD I lay my hands on into my CD player and I sang as loud as I could, smashing the keys on the laptop as I typed. I managed to complete two PowerPoints for Monday – just three more to go. I opened another word document to begin typing up work sheets for Frank's class. I wrote a few questions on the latest poem we had read, making three variations of different difficulties to allow the students push themselves.

.

I finished an hour later and felt a lot calmer. I turned my music down and shut my laptop before moving from my desk to my bed and lying down, staring at the ceiling. Tears began to form in my eyes and seconds later they were flowing freely. I couldn't stop them no matter how hard I tried and my failure just made me cry even more. I didn't know what was wrong with me – I had no reason to be crying. Mikey got angry with me a lot and I knew that it wouldn't amount to anything serious, but it still hurt that he was mad at me. His criticisms hurt me more than anything else because of how much I loved him – it felt awful to be insulted by someone so influential in my life. Eventually, I pulled myself together and picked up a book from beside my bed – Bleak House. It was one of my favourites… it had such a compelling plot, but I couldn't concentrate on the words on the page at all.

.

7pm came about quicker than I had expected and I forced myself to go downstairs and order the pizza for the boys. I trudged down each step slowly and reluctantly before emerging into the living room where all four boys turned and stared at me. They were watching the end of some violent, gory horror film that I avoided looking at for too long, but I seemed to be far more interesting to them.

"Hey," Mikey said. "Can I talk to you in the kitchen, please?" I nodded solemnly and tried to ignore the multiple pairs of eyes that were focussed on me as I walked into the kitchen and shut the door. "I'm really sorry, Gee. I didn't mean to snap at you… I was just nervous. I really do appreciate everything that you have done for me today. It means a lot to me… I am having such a good night and it's all because of you," Mikey mumbled to me. "I didn't mean to upset you."

"I'm not upset," I replied quietly.

"Come on, Gee. I can see that you've been crying and you were angry earlier… we could barely hear each other over your music." I smiled weakly before drawing Mikey into a hug.

"Pizza?" I asked.

"Pizza."

.

Mikey left the kitchen to go and talk to his friends while I ordered the pizza. I hated talking on the phone as the conversations were always even more awkward than in real life, but I successfully ordered two extra-large pizzas and then headed back up to my room to wait for the delivery. As I walked past the living room, everyone stared at me again.

"I'm not your teacher at the moment, guys. And if you hadn't noticed, we do other things than work," I said sharply, causing them to all turn their heads away.

"Well how about you join us then," Ray said, turning back to me with a huge grin on his face – it was infectious and I smiled back.

"Awh, Ray, but Gerard's boring," Mikey teased. "He's almost as bad at watching horror films as Frank," he replied, nudging Frank in the arm.

"Hey!" Frank exclaimed. "I'm not _that_ bad… Look, they're scary okay!" Frank crossed his arms and let out a big sigh – it was quite comical.

"I'm okay, Mikey. Seriously… I don't want to bother you guys…"

"You won't be bothering us!" Ray chimed in, receiving a look from Mikey that said '_later, you're gonna be dead_.'

"I have to eat with you anyway, I guess. Is it okay, Mikey?" I asked, stunned that I was being asked to join an actual social gathering.

"Fine! But you have to sit with Frank and Bob 'cause I don't want you screaming down my ear all night," Mikey said, waving me over to the space on the floor next to Frank.

"Why not? You'll probably have Ray screaming down your ear all night anyway, right Mikey?" I responded quickly, smirking a little. Mikey's jaw fell slack, Ray went a violent shade of pink and Bob and Frank were helpless with laughter.

"Dude, high five," Bob said, holding his palm up to me.

.

Soon after Mikey had put another disc in, the pizza man turned up and Mikey and his friends set upon it like animals.

"So," Ray said, looking at me. "What are we meant to call you in situations like this? Mr Way… or what?"

"Umm, just Gerard, I guess." I took another bite of the pizza. "We're not in school and I'm not being a teacher so Gerard will do," I replied, rubbing awkwardly at my neck.

"Gerard," Frank repeated beside me. I looked at him and he blushed slightly. "It's just weird; I have an overwhelming urge to call you 'sir.'" I laughed.

"Gosh, please don't. I hate it sometimes. It sounds too formal… and this kind of situation isn't formal at all."

"I like your taste in music, Gerard. Were you playing The Misfits earlier? Nice choice," Frank said through a mouthful of pizza.

"Um, thanks. You like them too, I suppose. Nice top," I said, gesturing to his band merchandise.

"Thanks!" he exclaimed, beaming and turning back to the TV to watch the film after we got shushed by Mikey and Ray.

.

After a while all the pizza was gone, we had watched another two films and people began to fall asleep – first Ray, and then Bob. A Saw movie was playing in the background but no one was really watching it. Mikey was stroking Ray's hair as he had fallen asleep lying in Mikey's lap. He kept periodically smiling at him and his eyes kept drooping closed – he was obviously fighting the urge to sleep. Bob was completely fast asleep next to me, snoring lightly and moving a lot in his sleep. Frank and I had given up on watching the films hours ago and were instead sat talking to each other quietly about music, films, art, comics… anything that we could think of. We seemed to have a lot in common and I didn't find it difficult to keep a conversation going with Frank – maybe my interactions with Rosie had loosened me up a little.

"Has the bullying calmed down a little?" I finally asked, making Frank look down and close himself off again.

"It's not as bad as it was earlier this week… but they still don't leave me alone," he mumbled, picking at a rogue thread on the hem of his t-shirt.

"I'm sorry to bring it up again… it just worried me to see people treating you like that. It's not fair and it shouldn't go unpunished. I want to help, Frank," I said sincerely, placing a hand on his knee. "I really do." Frank looked up at me with big, wide eyes and smiled.

"Thank you, Gerard."

.

"I'm going to bed," I whispered to Mikey, standing up carefully as so not to wake Bob from his slumber.

"Really?" Frank piped up, suddenly looking sad again. "Do you have to go? It was fun talking to you."

"Why don't you just sleep down here, Gerard?" Mikey mumbled. "Just make up your mind quickly… I want to get some fucking sleep."

"Calm down… and I would but I don't have a sleeping bag, idiot."

"You can have mine," Frank offered. "I have a hoodie I can use as a kind of make-shift blanket and there are plenty of pillows to go round."

"Really?" I asked, in the same tone of surprise that Frank had used earlier. "That's really nice of you, Frank… Thanks." I smiled at him and he beamed back.

"No problem at all."

.

Morning soon came around, and I woke up with Frank's face barely inches from my own. I squeaked in shock which of course woke him up.

"'m sorry," he mumbled groggily, rubbing his eyes. "I didn't mean to roll so close."

"It's okay. I'm just not used to sleeping near people," I chuckled.

"It seems Mikey is," Frank whispered, jerking his head in my brother's direction. He was still asleep, cuddled right up to Ray with their noses touching – it was unbelievably cute.

"Do you want some breakfast?" I asked, sitting up and stretching. Frank nodded. "Vegetarian, right?"

"Yup," he said, smiling as if he was happy I had remembered.

"Cool. Do you want to wake the others up and ask them what they want for breakfast? I'll go make us some pancakes."

"Awesome! Yeah, I'll get them up, Gerard," he replied, standing up. I left the room and let Frank jump on Ray and Mikey to wake them up. They screamed and groaned and Frank giggled. I smiled to myself – it had been a good evening for Mikey.


	6. Chapter 6

Mikey's friends stayed around until about twelve o'clock when they began to leave. Bob was the first to leave and was picked up by his mom at midday because he had to visit family across town, but Ray and Frank stayed for another hour or so. We all lounged on the sofa or the floor, too tired to do anything useful with our time. Mikey flicked on the TV and began to search through the channels, finally deciding on a channel that was showing some cartoons but he didn't watch very much of it. He went upstairs with Ray instead to 'show him some of his comic books.' Frank and I ended up sat awkwardly on the sofa making conversation as best we could, knowing full well that the comic books upstairs had probably not even been touched. Eventually, the two other boys returned just as Frank was pulling his shoes on to leave.

"Do you guys want a lift?" Mikey offered, assuming that I would be happy to take the boys home.

"No thanks," Frank answered. "I'd like to get some fresh air to wake me up a bit." I was inwardly glad that he had declined the offer, as I didn't particularly want to leave the house.

"I'll walk back with you, Frank," Ray said, tugging his jacket on. Frank was already stood by the door looking impatiently at the taller boy.

"Okay," Frank said before walking up to Mikey and giving him a hug. "I'll see you on Monday. Bye, Gerard," he said, turning to me and giving me an awkward wave. I smiled at him and said goodbye too.

"Bye, Gerard. I'll see you Monday!" Ray gushed, giving me another infectious grin. I smiled back and thanked him for coming. Mikey gave Ray a quick peck on the lips and I smiled again – it was really rather cute.

.

Mikey shut the door and began gathering pillows and sleeping bags to take upstairs.

"Did you enjoy showing Ray your comics?" I asked wryly. Mikey shot me another one of his '_please don't do this to me'_ looks.

"He thought they were cool, thank you very much, Gee. Mom's going to be home in a few hours so we need to clean this house," he said, changing the subject. It was then that I looked around the once pristine living room and noticed that it was as if a bomb had gone off in the living room. I squeaked and immediately began scurrying around, picking up rubbish, pillows, crumbs and empty pizza boxes. I tidied, scrubbed, vacuumed and polished the house until every surface practically gleamed and there were no remnants of the sleepover left. It didn't take as long as I had previously expected to achieve this, but we were both wiped out by the end of it – despite the fact that it was me who had done most of the work. The hard work and lack of sleep the night before got on top of us and we both fell asleep on the sofa - half lying on each other, half hanging off the edge.

.

We were woken up by our mother's return a couple of hours later. She immediately noticed the bounce in Mikey's step and was impressed by how tidy I had managed to keep the house – she even agreed to let Mikey have more sleepovers in the future which he was obviously incredibly excited about. Despite her getting back late, dinner was still on the table at 6:45pm on the dot and we caught up on how mom's conference had gone. Mikey escaped to his room as soon as possible, presumably to play video games, but I stayed behind to help my mother. After washed the dishes and pots from the meal, I retired to my room to do mark some homework for my ninth graders. However, I was still far too tired and I couldn't concentrate on the dull documents, so I gave up and lay in my bed instead, picking up the first book I lay my hands on – Great Expectations. At about half past eleven, I was interrupted by Mikey knocking on my door softly so as not to wake up our mother who was already fast asleep a few rooms down.

.

"Hey, Gee," he began, flopping down on my bed next to me and grinning at me inanely. I rolled over to face him.

"What do you want, Mikey. It's late and you have school tomorrow you know."

"It's not _that_ late and so do you," he replied, sticking his tongue out at me; I tried to conceal my smile, but failed miserably. "So, how did you find my friends?"

"I've seen them before, Mikey," I said, rolling back over onto my back and staring up at the ceiling, praying he would leave soon so I could get a decent night's sleep.

"Yeah, but not like this. You've _seen_ them before… not _met _them," Mikey said, sighing exasperatedly.

"Granted, I have never met Bob in person, but I teach both Ray and Frank."

"Gerard! Can you just answer the question please?!" I grinned, knowing how infuriatingly uncooperative I was being.

"They were nice… Bob seemed like a decent guy and I think Ray will be a good influence on you and I think he could make you happy… and Frank – well, he's just so sweet," I said, smiling at Mikey. "He's so compliant and respectful. You should aim to be a little more like your friends yourself, Mikey."

"Fuck you!" Mikey said, opening his mouth in mock astonishment and hitting my arm with a reasonable force.

"Fuck you too, Mikey. Now get out of my bed because I would like to try and get a good night's sleep. You complained every day last week because you were 'tired' in the morning - try getting more than six hours of sleep then!" Mikey thumped me again, before drawing me into a hug and leaving. I fell into a deep sleep almost seconds after he had left.

.

I awoke just before my alarm went off the next day and got out of bed like a shot, feeling reasonably refreshed. I didn't have to wake Mikey up for another hour, so I went downstairs to make myself a cup of black coffee – how I had started every day for years. I was surprised to see my mom sat at the kitchen table, reading some of her work documents closely and sighing deeply.

"Mom?" I said tentatively, walking over to the table and sitting down next to her. I immediately feared the worst. A redundancy notice? Bills we couldn't afford? Repossession of the house? "What's wrong?"

"Nothing really, sweetheart. I'm just having a dilemma. Apparently I represented the company really well on the business trip Saturday and now they would like me to go to a huge, very important conference in Ireland for a week in two weeks' time." I let out a deep breath, mentally scolding myself for overreacting so severely.

"That's amazing, mom. I'm so proud of you!" I said, standing behind her and giving her a congratulatory hug.

"I don't know whether to take it or not… I mean, they're going to pay me a lot of money to attend, and I haven't been abroad since your dad passed away. I think that I would enjoy it… and the money would always be a bonus. I need all I can get to boost Mikey's college fund in case he decides to go. Then again, it's so long for you to be alone in this house looking after Mikey – you've never been alone for that long before."

"Oh it's fine, mom – honestly!" I replied with zest, smiling at her and cupping her hand in mine. "I managed myself for four years in England so I think I can control a house by myself. Also Mikey doesn't need that much looking after. As long as there is food in the house, he will be fine. It would be a great opportunity for you and it's not like Mikey and I would perish if we're left alone, right? We were fine this weekend when you were away, and the house was in perfect condition when you got back."

"I know, honey, but I don't think it's very responsible of me to leave my little babies alone."

"Mom. I'm not a child anymore, you know… and neither is Mikey." I sat back in my chair and scowled at the floor.

"Oh yes, because you are acting like such an adult at the moment aren't you."

"Very witty," I replied in my most sulky tone. Mikey descended the stairs moments later stumbling into the kitchen and putting the kettle on to boil.

"Oh my god," I exclaimed, clutching my chest in mock horror and leaning against the kitchen counter. "You're out of bed and I didn't have to venture into your pit to collect you! Put this in your diary, mom. This is a day you'll remember for the rest of your life." Mikey flipped me off behind moms back and with that I picked up my half full mug of coffee and returned to my bedroom to get ready for work.

.

When I went downstairs to put my shoes on, I was surprised to see Mikey already waiting eagerly by the door.

"Who rattled your cage this morning?" I asked, smiling at him.

"I'm just excited… that's all," Mikey replied, shrugging nonchalantly.

"What for?" I asked as we walked out to the car together, locking the door behind us. "Because I know it's not for your math test – you've done no revision for it, Mikey!"

"Don't sweat it! I'm good at math… it will be fine, 'nd I'm just excited to see Ray." I started the engine and watched Mikey check his hair in the mirror; I chuckled to myself.

"Suit yourself," I shrugged, beginning to drive. "If you fail, mom is going to be really pissed off. So you need to try your best." Mikey just sighed at me and pressed play on the CD, singing along as loud as he could and head banging.

.

Mikey practically jumped out of the car practically the second I put the brakes on and ran straight up to Ray, jumping on his back and clinging to his hair like a bridle. I giggled to myself.

"You seem like a morning person," a soft voice said from behind me. I turned to see Rosie locking up her car and walking towards me, sashaying her hips.

"Good morning, Rosie. You've changed the colour of your lipstick today – the pale pink certainly suits you," I said, smiling myself as I watched a large grin spread across her face. "It brings out the colour of your eyes more."

"I also see that you're rather bubbly and confident today. Good weekend?" She asked as we walked towards student reception.

"Yes, for once. Mikey had a sleepover and his friends were exceptionally welcoming to me – they allowed me to join them in watching horror films and eating all the junk food; it was awesome!"

"Ooh, well you'll have to tell me about it soon, but I have a job to get on with," she said, winking at me. "How about we meet up for a drink after school?" I froze for a second but regained composure quickly.

"I'm really sorry, but I'm not free tonight," I replied, feeling guilty as I watched her natural, gleaming smile become forced and her eyes became a little sad.

"Oh, ok. No problem at all. I'm sure you're a very busy man, Mr Way – maybe we could schedule this date for another time?"

"Of course, Rosie. We can discuss it over lunch… Well, I have to go and set up my lesson and you have to man the reception, so I'll see you later," I mumbled.

"Your lesson doesn't start for another half an hour!" She shouted after me as I walked down the corridor at great speed.

"I have a lot to set up!" I called back, shoving my hands in my pockets and going outside to find Mikey, who was now hiding in a corner of the yard smoking.

.

"Mikey, I need to talk to you," I said upon reaching the corner of the school yard that he was lurking in, glaring at the cigarette in his hand until he extinguished it.

"What do you want, Gerard. I'm busy; don't you have a classroom to be organising?"

"Shut up, Mikey – this is serious. I think I just got asked out on a date by Miss Nightingale," I whispered, blushing and rubbing my neck.

"Rosie?" Mikey asked, wide eyed. I nodded and made a non-committal humming noise. "Well what did you say to her this morning to make her ask you?"

"I- I don't know," I stammered. "I just told her that her lipstick brought out the colour of her eyes." Mikey groaned.

"Gerard that is so flirty. Anyway, are you going to say yes?"

"No… no way."

"Why?"

"Because I don't feel like that, Mikey… plus it's very unprofessional," I replied, raising my head a little and wrinkling my nose. "Relationships in the workplace are looked down upon in most establishments."

"Maybe it's just because you're a loser and you're scared, Gerard. You don't even know _how_ to be with someone," Mikey replied shortly. I stepped back.

"You're a dick," I muttered and walked off, realising Mikey was going to be no help today.

"I'm sure you're not allowed to say that to students!" he called after me; I could hear the smile in his voice. I stormed off to my classroom to prepare my lesson for the seventh graders. They could be quite rowdy, but most of the time they were easily controlled.

.

I avoided the reception area at lunch, although I felt bad for leaving Rosie alone. I stayed in my classroom, eating my packed lunch on my own and reading over some of the work my previous class had handed in. I couldn't concentrate though… there just wasn't anything _right_ about liking Rosie – it didn't matter how hard I tried to picture her as my girlfriend, it just didn't seem right. She was a colleague and a good friend but I simply did not _like_ her like that. I began to think about what Mikey had said to me earlier – maybe I was weird and incapable of holding a relationship. I was drawn from my thoughts by a soft knock at the door – my stomach dropped and I hoped that it wasn't Rosie coming to look for me instead.

"Come in," I called, swivelling my chair around to face the door. The doorknob turned and Frank walked in - I let out a breath that I didn't even know I was holding. "Hello, Frank," I said, smiling from ear to ear. "Can I help you with anything?"

"Umm… I didn't really understand the poem that we did on Thursday, and I was wondering if you could help me… if you're not bust, I mean," he said, wringing his hands anxiously and looking at the floor.

"Why didn't you mention it in class?" I asked; he shrugged in response. "Or you could have asked me at Mikey's sleepover."

"That was out of school though, and I didn't think that you would have wanted to be dealing with school work at the weekend."

"You can ask me whenever, Frank – I work most of the time when I'm at home anyway. So do you want to come and sit down and go over it now?" I asked, earning a large grin from him.

.

I spent the entire of lunch going through the poem thoroughly with Frank, revelling in the attention that he paid me – undivided and intense. I felt like a guiding figure and like I was making a significant difference to this small boy's education, even though it was a very small section of the course. Frank nodded when I said important and valuable things, and jotted them down quickly in his notebook, which I noticed to have a 'Batman' design on the cover.

"Hey," I said, making Frank jump. He raised his eyes from the book to look at me. "That's a cool notebook." I grinned, and Frank mirrored my action. "Is this making more sense now that I've explained it like this?"

"Yeah… I guess it's just hard to know exactly what the author means," Frank said quietly.

"Well we don't know exactly what they mean – that's what makes poetry so difficult," I mused allowed. Frank looked at me with confusion and I smiled softly at him. "For example, this poem is blatantly about someone losing someone special to you, but there are different ways to interpret it. You could say that the author's message is that death is sometimes a blessing, as the girl he's talking about was blatantly suffering or he could be talking about the tragedy of death and how hard it is for the people left behind. Both interpretations can be backed up, so neither is incorrect. It's all about interpretation and perception – no one can tell you that how you feel when you read something is wrong. Your interpretations, your opinions, your beliefs and your feelings are just as valid as anyone else's – as long as you can justify them. " Frank stared at me, overwhelmed by what I had said. I blushed a little as he continued to lock eyes with me.

.

The bell suddenly rang, making us both jump, and Frank got up to leave; he gushed a 'thank-you' and gathered his work, scurrying out of the classroom like a frightened mouse. I pouted as I realised I had been left alone in the stuffy classroom, wondering what had made Frank leave so abruptly. I shook my head, stood up, walked to the computer and loaded up the files for my next class, remembering that I had left Rosie sat on her own for the entire of lunch. I had spent the entire lunch helping a student… she ought to understand that matters of education must come before personal affairs. She didn't have to know that I had no intention of making an arrangement in the first place.


	7. Chapter 7

I completed my last two lessons somewhat quietly, my mind kept preoccupied with thoughts of Rosie while my mouth kept rambling about persuasive techniques. I feared that I had destroyed the basis of my first Friendship, but I that I had done was work with Frank. Of course, it wasn't Frank's fault though, just a fault of my own over-working nature. I managed to shake off the overwhelming feeling at the end of fourth period, only to have the guilt return in an even stronger form at the end of period five.

The bell rang, startling me out of my lament, and the students began to gather their belongings together. I sat down heavily in my chair, realising that I couldn't hide from Rosie any longer and that I would now have to face her.

"You can go when you're ready, guys," I said to the class, gesticulating weakly. They began to leave the room quickly, pushing and shoving to get out of the classroom before all the others. I sighed deeply. Whilst putting my work away in my bag, I began to formulate a speech to give to Rosie upon arrival at reception. "Hey… I'm really sorry for not coming at lunch time. No… I'm sorry I didn't come down to see you earlier. Argh!" I threw my bag down in frustration and put my head in my hands on the desk.

"Gerard, what are you doing?" I heard a familiar voice say from the doorway.

"Go away, Mikey," I replied, looking up to see my brother leaning casually against the door frame. "Why are you here?"

"You're meant to be taking me home, genius." He walked into the room and sat at the desk opposite me.

"Look. I take it you didn't go to see Rosie at lunch?" He asked. I nodded. "Yeah. Frank said he was with you. At least you managed to get him into a good mood… more than me, Ray and Bob could do."

"Why, what's wrong with him?"

"That doesn't matter; I'll tell you later. Anyway – you blew her off. Deal with it! Why are you sat in here beating yourself up over it? Just go down to student reception and tell her you're not interested instead of hiding up here. You're such a baby."

"I can't do that, Mikey," I said, rolling my eyes at him. "It's rude!"

"So is ignoring her for a whole day," he pointed out in an all-knowing fashion. I wrinkled my nose and looked downwards, accepting defeat and realising that I was the person in the wrong here.

"What am I meant to say to her though? It's difficult for me."

"That's 'cause you're too bloody socially awkward. You're such an idiot sometimes you know, Gerard. Why don't you like her anyway? She's nice, smart, pretty… I just don't get it," Mikey said, cocking his head a little and looking straight into my eyes; I looked away, feeling uncomfortable. I shrugged.

"I just don't feel anything and I value our friendship too much," I replied, clasping my hands in my lap and avoiding making eye contact with Mikey.

"Do you feel anything with anyone else?"

"I don't think so…besides, I probably wouldn't know I did. Anyway, your question was irrelevant as I wouldn't tell you if I did anyway!" I exclaimed, grabbing my bag and walking hastily towards the reception area with Mikey trotting along behind me in close pursuit.

* * *

><p>"Where were you at lunch?" Rosie asked, the second I stepped through the foreboding double doors that lead from the car park to student reception. Mikey had decided to wait outside by the car – I was all on my own and I had never felt more intimidated.<p>

"I was helping on of my year 11s with their poetry work."

"Really? Which one?"

"Frank."

"Iero?"

"Yes…"

"All lunch?"

"Yes!"

"Well that's funny, because he was stood outside the front here with your brother and his friends for the first 10 minutes of lunch – why didn't you come down then?" she said, folding her arms across her chest; my stomach dropped.

"Look – I didn't come because I didn't come. I am not obliged to come down here every lunch time," I snapped, raising my head slightly.

"Fine," she replied, dropping her arms to her sides and looking down. "I'm sorry, okay? You're not into me and that's completely fine… I guess I've just got to get over it, right?"

"Yeah. I guess… I'm really sorry though, Rosie. I just don't feel anything between us," I replied.

"Can I ask you something?" she asked tentatively.

"Yes, of course."

"Are you gay or something?" I blinked a few times before composing myself.

"Umm... What? No. No… at least I-I don't think so. I wouldn't even know if I was."

"Ok then. Well I'll see you tomorrow morning then, Mr Way," she said, turning round and scurrying off, leaving me stood there feeling guiltier than before.

* * *

><p>"Mikey… am I gay?" I asked my brother the minute we had driven out of the car park.<p>

"How the fuck am I supposed to know – you don't like people!" Mikey exclaimed, gazing out of the window at the passing streets.

"Maybe I do… how am I meant to know? How would you define liking someone, Mikey?"

"Umm… I'm not sure," he replied distantly.

"Well how do you feel when you see Ray?" I asked. A blush appeared on Mikey's cheeks – it was so sweet.

"Well, I feel happy when I see him – but not just normal happy… it's like an overwhelming happiness. Also, when I see him it feels like I haven't talked to him in months, even though I saw him the day before. I want to touch him all the time, even just holding hands… I just want his comfort. He just makes me feel really warm and comfortable… Is that the sort of response you're looking for?" Mikey said, his blush becoming more obvious.

"But I feel like that with books. They make me overwhelmingly happy; I feel like I haven't read them in months, even though I read one yesterday and they comfort me. It doesn't make sense."

"It makes perfect sense, Gee, you're just fucking weird!" Mikey said, laughing out loud so hard he snorted.

"At least I don't snort when I laugh," I grumbled, pulling into the drive way of the house.

I got out the car and locked it, following Mikey up the bright white steps to the front door. It was unlocked, meaning that mum was home from work which was unusual on a Monday night – she didn't return until 4:30, and it was merely four o'clock. I unlaced my shoes and placed them neatly on the shoe rack, tutting as I had to straighten Mikey's shoes that he had blatantly just thrown onto the wire rack.

"Mum?" I called out, loosening my tie as I entered the living room. She was sat in front of the television watching some form of cooking programme, but jumped upon my entry.

"Shush, baby – not so loud," she said, touching her forehead with the back of her hand.

"Why are you home so early?"

"I'm ill, and the company practically had to drag me from the office to make me go home. This is the first day that I've had off since your dad's funeral. Also, I've decided that I'm going to take the opportunity that they offered me and go to Ireland for this conference. It took a lot of thinking about, but I've decided that you and Mikey are old enough to look after yourself and that you're capable of staying out of trouble. Am I correct?" She asked, standing up straight and clasping her hands in front of her chest.

"Of course, mum. So are you going to go to bed and rest now?" I asked, controlling the excitement inside of me.

"Oh good heavens, no," she replied. "I have a conference to prepare for, so I would appreciate it greatly if you and Mikey could both stay upstairs until dinner time." I nodded, and started to climb the stairs. "Oh, and can you tell Mikey to keep his music down please?" She called after me.

"Okay!" I Called back, and proceeded to ascend the stairs.

First, I went to my room to change and put all of my work away. I checked the time – 4:15pm. I was cutting it fine if I wanted to get all of my work done and achieve a reasonably good night's sleep, but I had to inform Mikey of the good news that was coming his way. I put all of my work clothes in my laundry basket before padding across the landing to Mikey's room. I knocked three times and waited for him to answer. He called a quick "come in" and I tentatively opened the door. I was greeted by a most pleasant sight – his room was clean for once.

"Nice job on the cleaning, Mikey," I said, looking around his room and noticing that actually many things were out of place; I resisted the urge to straighten it all. "I have some good news for you." Mikey was lying on his bed flicking through a comic, but closed it and sat up after I had spoken.

"Go on then, Gee. Don't you have some sexual attractions to ponder?"

"Thanks, Mikey. Thanks a lot. And no, I don't as I have no bloody sexual attractions. And anyway, that's not what I'm here to talk about. Mum's going away for a business trip in two weeks' time, and she's going to be gone for a whole week, so I was going to come and suggest that you had a sleepover that weekend if you wanted another one."

"Fuck yes!" Mikey exclaimed; I immediately shushed him. "Sorry, but of course I do! I need to ask Mum if I can sleep at Ray's this weekend though… is she in a bad mood?" I nodded. "Oh… well I'll ask her tomorrow.

"Well I'm not planning on telling mum about this sleepover as it will just make her worry while she's away. Equally, I'm probably going this weekend. Just remember, you're only 16, Mikey."

"I'm fully aware of that, and you're just jealous that you're six years older than me and can't get any."

"No, Mikey, I'm really _really_ not," I said, before sticking my middle finger up at him and leaving to complete my work for the night.


	8. Chapter 8

The two weeks passed so quickly that I barely noticed them – I was becoming so involved in my work that I hardly slept anymore. My mum was becoming tenser every day, planning her trip, writing her notes and packing her suitcase. The combination of my mother's negative atmosphere and my own was taking its toll on Mikey; his relationship with Ray was suffering severely as Mikey never left the house anymore, only for school where he would skulk off to his classroom before even saying goodbye to his friends. Recently he had also started turning his phone off and staying in his room all day, only emerging to get food or go to the toilet. I could see what he was doing to himself but I hadn't the time to take to him. We were all slowly destroying ourselves.

On the Thursday – the day before Mum was due to leave – Mikey burst into my room… without knocking.

"MIKEY!" I yelled, practically jumping out of skin because of his dramatic entrance.

"I want a party," Mikey said shortly, sitting down heavily on my bed. I turned my chair away from the desk to face him.

"Umm… with Ray, Bob and Frank?" I said uncertainly.

"No. With a lot of people. What we have here isn't normal, Gerard! Normal teenagers don't act like this. They go out. They get pissed. They fuck. Why can't I do that, Gee?" His voice cracked and tears began streaming down his face. I went over to him quickly, sitting down and putting my arm around his shoulder – a feeble attempt to comfort him.

"Mikey… Mum didn't even like you having a sleepover here and you were allowed to do that – don't push your luck. She won't let you have a party… especially not with alcohol," I replied, trying to gently inform Mikey of the truth of the matter.

"Mum doesn't have to know."

"Yes she does."

"Why? She's not going to be here! We could have it this Saturday and then it's half term! You'll have a whole week to recover and make sure everything is back to normal, Gee. Please… It would mean the world to me," he said, looking up at me with big, sparkly, brown eyes – he looked so upset that I couldn't resist it.

"Fine… fine. ONCE! Do not expect this to become some kind of weekly action. This is ridiculous though – I'm a TEACHER and I'm going to allow a load of minors drink under my roof. I fucking hate you."

"I love you, Gee," Mikey said, hugging me tightly before jumping up and running back to his room, presumably to text or call all of his friends to inform them that there would be a party here on Saturday night.

* * *

><p>"Bye then, boys… and please - try not to trash the place while I'm gone. I'll miss you both so much!" mum said, drawing us both into a tight embrace. I hugged her back, breathing in her fresh, clean smell and smiling broadly. The taxi was already outside, waiting for my mother to finish fussing over my brother and I.<p>

"Mum, we've got to get to school!" Mikey exclaimed, wriggling free of my mum's vice-like grip.

"Unfortunately, I have to agree," I replied. "Bye, mum… we'll miss you too." We all got into our designated vehicles and drove away. I set off for school, Mikey in the seat next to me tapping away on his phone.

"So… how's your party planning going, Mikey?" I asked.

"Absolutely brilliant!" he replied enthusiastically. "Ray, Frank nd Bob are all coming, obviously; so are Pete, Taylor, Alicia, Lindsey, Jack, Patrick, Amy, Brian, Jamia, Matt and Alex."

"Great guest list, Mikey," I said, my voice thick with sarcasm.

"Fuck off," Mikey said, smiling. "There're loads of others... but I don't really care about them – they're just going to be there to make up the numbers and make me look better." I laughed. "You need to go get the alcohol tonight, Gee. I'm going back with Ray tonight so I won't see you. I'll make a list and tell Frank to give it you in English." I made an unhappy noise in the back of my throat, which earned me an over-dramatic sigh from Mikey. "For goodness sake, Gerard. You need to calm down. Maybe you should have some of the alcohol."

"No fucking way," I replied. "Don't be late back from Ray's tonight. I have a lot of planning to go through with you." Another sigh ensued and I rolled my eyes, pulling into the school car park.

The day dragged on and I got more agitated as the day went on. I ventured down to student reception at lunch time in order to please Rosie – she was happy that I showed up, but things were blatantly a little awkward. She asked about my weekend plans and I lied through my teeth, telling her I was going away to relax a bit. I knew that if the school found out that I was providing students with alcohol, my career in teaching would most definitely be over. She smiled and nodded and questioned my destination, I immediately settled for 'the coast' and left it at that. Rosie nodded, taking small bites of her sandwich and curling her lips so that her bubble-gum pink lipstick didn't smudge. Just before the bell rang, I excused myself politely and returned to my classroom to set up. Frank was in my next class, and hopefully he would be bringing me my shopping list.

"Hey, sir… I have your list from Mikey," Frank said at the end of the lesson. He had come up to me after everyone else had left and was looking exceptionally nervous.

"I don't bite, Frank. You don't have to look so on edge when you're near me," I replied, smiling at him and taking the paper from him. He grinned at me and scurried out the classroom. I sighed – he was a nice boy. I opened the folded piece of paper and saw Mikey's scruffy handwriting on the page.

_Gerard,_

_You need a shit load of vodka (nice quality, not cheap, bargain shit, but equally don't spend your life savings on it), a shit load of beer and some mild stuff like WKD or something. Now, I know this is going to be a hard task for you but please don't fuck it up. Call me if it's ABSOLUTELY necessary, but I'm gonna be busy with Ray so it's probably in your best interests not to ;D_

_Mikey. X_

I rubbed my neck nervously and tucked the paper into my blazer pocket before gathering all my belongings together and going down to student reception to collect any paperwork I'd had photocopies and, of course, to say goodbye to Rosie. She wasn't there though when I arrived, which perplexed me a little – maybe she had taken my advice to get over me and just left me all together. I tried not to dwell on the thought for too long though, and rushed off to purchase all the items on Mikey's list.

It was the day of the party, and I was on the verge of having a panic attack. I had been running around like a lunatic, grabbing all breakable and valuable items from all around the house and removing them to my bedroom; I had cleaned the house to within an inch of its life and I had set out all of the food and drinks. Mikey, on the other hand, had been more focussed on creating a playlist for the event.

"If you want to play music out of speakers, then you had better bring your stereo down because I've taken mum's upstairs so it can't get broken," I said to him, to which he began to have a go at me about how his 'friends aren't animals' and 'why can't you trust me with equipment Gerard, gosh!' The only item of value that I couldn't remove from the living room was the TV, because I couldn't do it by myself and Mikey wouldn't help me. That issue was solved, however, when Ray, Bob and Frank arrived and immediately offered to help me carry it upstairs. Mikey lay on the sofa and sighed deeply.

"Dude, your brother is letting you have this party… you should be at least _trying_ to help him!" Ray had said, before helping me unhook the TV off the wall. Mikey just sat and mumbled to himself about how stupid I was and how he didn't care if I was letting him have the party, the house now looked weird.

* * *

><p>The first guests arrived at 9, and I withdrew to my bedroom immediately – nothing would be more awkward than your English teacher watching you at a party where you would be breaking the law by underage drinking… but I tried to put that out of my head. Mikey was playing his music exceptionally loud, the floor underneath my feet vibrating as I tried to concentrate on marking tests that the year 10s had completed for me. Eventually I gave up, realising that I had the whole half term to do this work, and I would be able to concentrate better.<p>

Two hours had passed and the party was now in full swing. I snuck out of my room and peered over the banister of the stairs, and saw a sea of bodies dancing, drinking and making out – lovely. I tutted and returned to my room, not knowing what to do as I couldn't sleep, I couldn't read and I couldn't work – it was excessively frustrating. I suddenly realised how hungry I was, but I didn't particularly want to go downstairs and tackle the hordes of people in my living room; I called Mikey's phone, but there was no answer. I sighed, realising that I would have to go downstairs because there was no way I was going to be able to sleep while I was this hungry. I changed out of my pyjama pants and put some jeans and a band tee on before scurrying down the stairs as quickly as possible.

I was accosted by a very drunk Mikey in the kitchen.

"GEEEEEE!" he shouted at the top of his lungs, before launching himself at me and squeezing me tightly. "Oh my gosh, I'm so happy! Thank you so much for letting me have this party! Do you want a drink?" he slurred. I rolled my eyes.

"No, Mikey. I don't want a drink. I want some fucking food, considering the fact that I don't seem to be able to sleep upstairs." Mikey giggled. I pushed past him, grabbed a pack of crisps and then turned to leave, bumping into Frank as I turned around.

"Hi, Gerard!" He exclaimed, smiling from ear to ear.

"Hey, Frank. I'm just going back upstairs… have a nice time," I gushed, before removing myself from this entirely social scenario.

"Gerard!" Mikey yelled after me. I stopped and turned around. He threw two bottle of some form of alcoholic beverage at me and winked; I rolled my eyes but took it up to my room, weaving in and out of all the bodies that awkwardly stopped dancing when I passed. It wasn't my fault that I taught most of them.

When I got to my room I stared long and hard at the alcohol before finally deciding to open the bottles and drink them, whilst eating my food. It tasted relatively nice, I supposed, but it did have quite an odd tangy aftertaste. I downed the liquid and felt the effects suddenly – this was probably due to my lack of experience with the substance and so my body wasn't used to it. I lay on my bed and about 20 minutes later there was a quiet knock on my door; I ignored it. The person knocked again and I heaved myself up off the bed, giggling at how weird I felt. I opened the door and Frank was stood there, smiling at me and holding another bottle of alcohol.

"Mikey told me to bring it to you," he said, holding the bottle out in front of him. I took it and smiled at him.

"Do you want to come in, Frank?" I asked, opening the bottle and taking a large gulp of the vibrantly coloured liquid. He nodded and entered my room; I shut the door after him to block out all of the noise from downstairs. "Not much of a party person, Frank?" I asked, stumbling a little over my words.

"No, not really. I feel a bit awkward down there," he laughed nervously. I passed him the bottle and he took a sip. Rubbing his face and sitting down on the bed. I sat next to him and we drank together in silence for a while.

Without warning, Frank's lips suddenly came crashing down on mine, his hand cupping my face and his eyes close. Maybe it was the alcohol, or the adrenaline or something, but I began kissing him back, enjoying this feeling greatly. I didn't know whether I was doing it right, having not kissed someone before, but Frank hadn't pulled away yet. I ran my hand down his spine and he shivered, pulling away immediately.

"I shouldn't-" he began, but I cut him off by delving back in for another kiss. He swivelled his body round so that he was sat in my lap and I lay backwards so he was suddenly lying on top of me. His hips twitched and I groaned into his mouth; I supposed Frank liked that as I felt him smile while he was kissing me. Suddenly I came to my senses and the surroundings and situation came flooding back to me. I broke the kiss, startled and ashamed by what I had just done. Frank immediately got off me, stood up and backed away to the other side of the room.

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. Oh my god. I'm so sorry," he stammered, tears filling his eyes.

"It's okay, Frank," I said in a calm manner. "Maybe you should go." He nodded and hastily ran out of my room, closing the door behind him. I lay back on my bed and burst into tears. If anyone found out about that, I would be fired.


	9. Chapter 9

I awoke suddenly and ran to the bathroom to throw up. I felt awful. My head was spinning and felt like someone was beating on my brain like a big bass drum. My legs felt so weak that I could barely even stand and consequently I had to pull myself up on the bath tub into a standing position. I realised what I needed to cure this problem: coffee and painkillers. I practically crawled downstairs and into the kitchen to boil the kettle, passing Mikey and his friends that were crashed out on the couch, surrounded by empty bottles. One of the people in the tangled mess was snoring so loudly, it was a wonder the rest were sleeping. The events of last night suddenly made themselves present in my head without my permission. Frank. I peered around the kitchen door to look at the bundle of bodies on the floor. Bob… Mikey… Ray… No Frank. I let out a breath of relief that I wasn't even aware that I was holding – I felt so guilty.

I woke the three boys up and offered them coffee, with earned me a stream of groans and mumbles yes's. The living room looked like bomb had hit it, but I shook off the need to clean and returned to the kitchen. I got 4 mugs out of the cupboard and began drumming my fingers impatiently on the kitchen work surface. After making four, strong coffees, we all sat on the sofa in silence, sipping our drinks and feeling sorry for ourselves.

"Where's Frank?" I asked quietly after a considerable number of minutes of silence.

"We don't know," Mikey replied, taking a gulp of his coffee.

"He left," Ray interjected. "I saw him come downstairs crying and then he just left."

"But we've tried to get hold of him," Mikey continued. "He's not answering his phone."

"And he still isn't," Bob mumbled, putting his phone on the table in front of us.

"Well do you want me to drive you to his house? I can clean this up while you're gone," I asked. They all nodded slowly to cause their heads as little pain as possible. "What time it is?"

"One o'clock."

"What? That's insane! Why did you let me sleep that long? Go and get in the car. We're going," I said, ushering them all out of the door. They groaned at me, holding their heads, grabbing their shoes and stumbling out of the door. I grabbed my coat and keys and locked the door behind me.

They all piled out of the car upon arrival at Frank's house where I watched them walk up to the door and knock. Frank answered, his hair sticking up at wild angles, his eyes bloodshot and full of tears; I felt my heart break a little. He glanced in my direction and broke into a fresh fit of sobs that I could hear through the cold metal frame of the car. Mikey drew him into a soft embrace before they all solemnly entered the house and shut the door behind them.

I drove home as fast as I could, my eyes blurred by tears that I blinked away as fast as possible. I forbid myself to think of the situation and slammed the door of the house as hard as I could when I arrived home. I began collecting all of the empty glass bottles that were carelessly strewn across the living room floor. I found a multitude of different plastic bags to place the bottles in; I had the intention of driving down to the bottle bank after I picked Mikey up from Frank's house. Luckily, no one had thrown up in the house – the kids held their alcohol better than I did – but the house still smelt absolutely awful. I threw open all of the windows throughout the house and unlocked my mother's bedroom door, which is where I had stored all of our valuables from downstairs – they were all still there. I quickly cleared the living room, vowing to thoroughly disinfect every surface later, before bringing all of the ornaments and other belongings down from my mother's room. However, I could not manage to carry the television downstairs – I would have to wait for Mikey to get home for that anyway.

I had nearly finished sanitising the living room when Mikey came in, slamming the door behind him almost as hard as I had earlier.

"You fucking asshole!" he yelled at me, walking up to me and standing so close his nose was practically touching my own.

"Wh-what did I do?" I stammered.

"My best friend is currently crying his eyes out to my boyfriend and Bob because of _you."_

"H-he told you?"

"Of course he did, idiot. He's fucking heartbroken and thinks you hate him. How fucking _dare_ you do that to him!"

"Mikey, please – listen to me," I pleaded.

"Why should I?"

"Because _he_ made the advance! _He _kissed _me_!" I had begun to shake violently. "I didn't mean to!"

"Did you like it?" Mikey asked, his voice calmer now.

"I-I can't think about it like that. It's illegal."

"SO?" Mikey exclaimed, gesticulating violently with his arms. "So was the underage drinking that you condoned last night. Did you like it?" he repeated.

"I don't know… maybe? But Mikey, he's your age and I'm his teacher. It's stupid and I'm not talking about it anymore," I replied shortly, dismissing all thoughts of Frank from my head.

"_Asshole,"_ Mikey mumbled before skulking up the stairs to his room.

I sat down heavily on the sofa, placing my head in my hands and trying not to cry. I thought of how upset Frank had looked after the _incident _and felt my stomach dropped. Immediately my brain switched to how _good _it felt to have him on top of me, his body pressed against mine and his tongue in my mouth. '_You're sick_ a voice' in my head said and I knew it was right. Mikey had confused me. Mikey had made me think of it properly – and I felt guilty. I pulled my knees up to my chest and curled into a ball on the sofa. Never in my life had I don't anything as bad as this to **anyone.** Sure, I had stepped on people to get what I wanted, but I had never crushed someone and made them cry their heart out. _'What's going to happen when you have to see him at school?'_ The voice in my head persisted. I wasn't sure. I couldn't treat him differently, as that may draw attention to the fact that something had happened, but on the other hand, I couldn't talk to him as the guilt and the heartbroken looks would be too much for me.

I climbed the stairs to Mikey's room and knocked on the door – he shouted for me to come in.

"Hey, Mikey… could I have Frank's number, please? I need to call him and apologize," I mumbled, not making eye contact with my brother.

"Maybe I should call Ray… Frank's not going to answer his phone. I'll tell Ray to put Frank on," he replied, still a hint of anger in his voice. I clasped my hands in front of me awkwardly. Mikey put his phone to his ear and began talking to Ray soon after. "Hey, baby… yeah, Gee wants to talk to Frank… yeah I know… But tell him to just try, okay?" Mikey thrust the phone at me – I took it and placed it to my ear.

"Hello?" I mumbled into the speaker.

"Hey Gerard," a small, weak voice said on the end of the line. He sniffed.

"Frank… I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to upset you, it just kind of happened," I said. Mikey hit me in the leg and I yelped.

"I'm s-sorry I did that and I…I -" Frank's voice became very high pitched and he burst into a fresh fit of sobs. I heard what sounded like Ray in the background trying to comfort Frank.

"Oh, Frankie please don't cry. No, don't blame yourself. It's my fault, okay?" I said into the speaker, running a hand through my hair. Mikey was staring at me intently. "Tell me what I can do to help or make it better or _something._" I was becoming exceptionally distressed.

"I don't know, Gerard… It just seems so fucked up. It's my fault. I can't help how I feel. But I need to tell you something."

"Yeah? What, Frankie?" I asked, my heart rate increasing.

"I think I love you."

The phone line went dead and I dropped Mikey's phone on the floor. I was vaguely aware of him yelling at me for having no respect for his belongings, but that didn't matter. Nothing mattered. Nothing at all.


	10. Chapter 10

"Gee, are you actually going to leave your room anytime soon?" Mikey said from outside my door. I could hear the worry in his voice even if he tried to conceal it. It was 10pm I hadn't left my room since around 3pm the day previous. I hadn't eaten, I hadn't drank, I hadn't done anything except lie on my bed and blame myself for the entire situation. I didn't understand how anyone could declare _love_ for someone who had been in their life for only a matter of weeks! Especially when that person was as unattractive as I perceived myself. He couldn't have meant it… he _shouldn't_ have meant it and I couldn't believe it. This was completely ridiculous!

"No," I replied shortly.

"Come on, Gee. No one will tell me what's happened. Frank left the room before he said whatever has sent you both into spiralling a deep depression, so Ray and Bob didn't hear either. He's so upset, Gerard, and Ray had to stay at his house last night to make sure he didn't do anything stupid." I sighed – the thought of Frank harming himself over something like this was even more frustrating. I dragged myself out of my bed, flattening down my hair that was more untidy than I could normally bear. I unlocked my door and saw Mikey standing right outside.

"He told me he loved me," I said monotonously, studying his face and finding his initial reaction – shock.

"He… he said what? B-but he would have _told _me if he liked you. I'm sure he would… I don't understand," Mikey stammered, striding into my room, sitting on my bed and putting his head in his hands.

"How do you think I feel, Mikey? My _student_ - who I let take part in underage drinking and who _kissed_ me – just told me he 'love's' me! Mikey I could get fired. If the school board found out and thought that I was encouraging this behaviour I would lose my job and never work as a teacher again." I ranted, waving my arms in the air wildly.

"We need to talk about this," Mikey said coldly. I stared at him as if he had just grown an extra head

"We are talking, Mikey, if you hadn't noticed. Now, what are we going to do?"

"No, I mean you, me, Frank, Ray and Bob… together."

"Woah," I said, raising my eyebrows and holding up my hands in front of me. "No. No chance, Mikey. He's _not_ coming here and I'm not going anywhere near him! I'm not risking my job any further."

"Well tough, I'm inviting him round. We're getting this sorted tonight," Mikey replied before walking out of my room putting his phone to his ear. I yelled in frustration – a loud, long, screech of anger that echoed throughout the house. I slammed the door and locked it, returning to my bed.

* * *

><p>"Gerard, everyone's here… are you going to come down or not?" Mikey said, the exasperation dominant in his voice.<p>

"No. You can't fucking make me," I yelled.

"Oh my god, stop acting like a damn spoilt child! Get your ass downstairs right this fucking instant so we can talk this out." Mikey shouted through the door and I heard him stomp down the stairs. I stood up and got changed slowly before brushing my hair thoroughly and glaring at myself in the mirror – I was an incredibly idiotic human being. I trudged down the stairs and entered the awkwardly silent living room with a permanent scowl etched upon my face – I felt outnumbered even though nobody had chosen sides.

"Hey, Gerard," Ray said, glancing up in my direction and giving me a smile that seemed a little too forced. I watched Frank's hand tighten on Ray's knee as my name was mentioned and he avoided eye contact with me completely.

"Hi." I sat down on the armchair away from the four boys sat on the sofa and tucked my knees up under my chin, glaring at them all.

"Right, we need to talk," Mikey said, taking on the teacher-like persona that I should have had. "Well, you and Frank need to talk really, Gerard. Me, Ray and Bob are completely irrelevant to this situation, but we're nosey and care about you both. Are you okay with talking this through, Frankie?" Frank nodded in response. "Why don't you start, Gerard?"

"Okay," I began, pausing to collect my thoughts; I saw Frank flinch at the sound of my voice. "Frank… that night was a-a mistake." He visibly curled in on himself and I immediately felt awful. "That's not what I meant, Frankie. I mean it shouldn't have happened because, to begin with, you were intoxicated and so was I."

"You weren't _that_ drunk," Frank mumbled.

"What do you mean by that," I said sharply, immediately going into 'self-defence' mode.

"I mean that you could have fucking stopped me but you didn't." Frank's voice was increasing in volume.

"Calm down, Frankie," Ray said, putting his hand on Frank's knee; Frank shot out of his seat like a bullet from a gun and began yelling.

"No! **NO**! I will not calm the fuck down. Why the _fuck _would you kiss me and let me practically grind you and then just dismiss it as 'oh… I made a mistake… it meant nothing.' Do I mean **nothing **to you? Do **my** feelings matter at all? You're not an innocent little boy you know Gerard – you can't get away with everything just because you're smarter than anyone else. Do you ever even stop to _think_ about the damage that you're causing me?" He flopped back down onto the sofa and began sobbing hysterically. I sat in my chair, dumfounded by the performance Frank had just directed at me.

"Of course I care. Why do you think that _I've_ been upset these past couple of days? Did you think about me and my job when you were making advances on me? I could get **fired**, Frank! I would lose everything that I have ever worked for. I mean, I'm your fucking teacher and this is sickening, but what's also sickening is that I fucking _liked_ it. I hate what I'm doing to you Frank. It's killing me to see you so upset. Hell, I hate _anybody _being upset. You're upsetting Ray, Bob and Mikey. Think about the consequences of your actions. You're just a child." I shrunk into my chair after my rant, my energy having all been used up.

"Wait…," Bob mumbled quietly. "You _liked _it?" Shit. I had said that. My eyes began welling up with tears as I realised the grave error that I had made.

"Big mistake Gerard," Mikey stated, putting his head in his hands. Frank just stared at me, wide-eyes, as if he was trying to process this new information.

Before I had time to take in what was happening, Frank had crossed the room and had placed his lips on mine. I cupped his face in my hand and kissed him back, ignoring the background noise of Ray, Mikey and Bob. The world seemed muted and I could barely move; my moth seemed to be working on its own – not thought required. Frank was leaning over me, one hand braced on the arm of the chair and the other tangled in my hair. I could feel the tears running down his cheeks and into my mouth, seasoning our kiss with salt. Eventually, he broke away much to my displeasure. He stumbled backwards and looked at me as if I was going to bring out a knife and murder him brutally. Mikey, Ray and Bob were sat very still with looks of acute horror on their faces.

"Well…," Ray said, blinking and looking at us both with disbelief. "That was an unexpected turn of events."

"I'm sorry," Frank mumbled, wiping the tears from his cheeks.

"It's fine, Frank. I don't mind. But you can't just keep doing that to me, okay? We need to work this out properly without you getting up and _kissing _me randomly."

"But did you like it?" he asked, a sly smile playing on his lips. I wondered where this new found confidence was coming from; maybe it was the excess adrenaline pulsing through his veins.

"Very much so," I breathed, and smiled back at him when he grinned from ear to ear.


	11. Chapter 11

So what's going to happen now?" Mikey asked, his head resting in his hands. Frank was sat back on the sofa in between Bob and Ray and I was still sat in the armchair, thoughts whizzing around in my head so fast that it was making me dizzy.

"I don't know," Frank replied, his voice stronger than it had been earlier. "What do you think we should do, Gee."

"Yeah, let's ask the _adult_ in this situation," Mikey spat. I couldn't decide whether he was angry at me for allowing Frank to fall for me, or at Frank for falling for me.

"Well first, Frank, I should probably tell you that I've never been with anyone like this before… so I don't know if I like you in the same way that you like me. I'm still really confused Frank and to be honest, I don't think that it would be a good idea to be together." I saw Franks face fall and it seemed as if every ounce of his new found confidence seeped out of his pores, leaving a withered boy behind. "However, we could give it a go if you wanted…" His face immediately lit up as if he was the happiest person alive.

"I would love that," he replied, sounding breathless and bewildered.

"Gerard, this isn't a good idea – if anyone finds out you'll lose your job and go to fucking jail. _Jail_ Gerard," Mikey exclaimed.

"Well we're not going to tell anyone," Ray said. Mikey scowled at him. "Awwh, c'mon, Mikey - you know what it's like to love someone." Mikey's facial expression softened a little, and he slid his hand into Rays – I smiled inwardly.

"And to be honest, Mikey – it's not like they're 30 years apart – Gerard's 22 and Frank's nearly 16," said Bob, smirking as Mikey's facial expression became severe again.

"Oh great, so my brother won't be a paedophile in a few weeks' time," Mikey exclaimed, throwing his hands in the air.

"Chill out, Mikey," Ray said, looking amused by the whole situation. I couldn't understand why my brother was so aggravated by the whole situation considering that it wasn't _his_ job that I was jeopardising and this wasn't his decision to make either.

"When is your birthday anyway, Frank?" I asked, smiling in his direction.

"Halloween," he replied, smirking as he was obviously aware that it was a fucking cool thing.

"That's fucking epic. Anyway, I think maybe the best thing that we could do at the moment is all go home and talk about it another time when we're not all hysterical or fuelled by testosterone. Is that okay with you guys?" I asked, finally taking an assertive role in the situation. All the boys agreed with me and shuffled out of the house, bidding goodbye to me and Mikey as they left. Ray pecked Mikey on the lips and Mikey went red, which I found incredibly sweet.

* * *

><p>"So what is your <em>huge<em> objection to this, Mikey," I asked after closing the door.

"You don't know what you're doing, Gerard," he replied, tapping his hands impatiently on the arm of the sofa as if trying to reign in his anger.

"But it's not your job I'm risking, Mikey. This has nothing to do with you." All of a sudden Mikey seemed to snap – he stood up and balled his hands to his fists. I flinched.

"If you fucking hurt him Gerard, I swear to God I will kill you. He has been hurt so many freaking times and you aren't even sure that you _like_ him," Mikey yelled, becoming more irate by the second. His lip began to quiver and astoundingly he began to cry. He ran off immediately and slammed his bedroom door. I didn't bother following – he would have only yelled at me some more.

Later in the evening, I took a tray with coffee and soup on it up to my brother to find him sleeping on the bed, fully clothed and looking pretty rough. I gently shook him awake.

"Mikey… I brought you some dinner up," I mumbled. He grunted 'thank you' and sat up on the bed, beginning to eat. "Why are you so upset, Mikey?" I asked.

"Because you didn't see Frank earlier," he whispered. "He kept saying he wanted to _die,_ Gee. I can't have him do that. Do you know how much I would blame myself?"

"He wanted to… kill himself?" I asked, trying to process this information – it was not going in. Mikey nodded in response, taking a spoonful of his soup. My head felt like it was exploding and an overwhelming feeling of guilt hit me like a tidal wave, swirling over my head and drowning me... I couldn't breathe.

"It's not your fault, Gee," Mikey said in a reassuring tone. "He's got a lot of issues. He won't want you to know though, so don't tell him I told you." I nodded and mumbled a farewell, leaving the room to go back downstairs.

I couldn't imagine Frank being so desperate that he would take his life. I was distraught. I had so many decisions to make, and now I had the added worry of them impacting so greatly on Frank's life that it would send him over the edge. This was unfair. Someone's life should never be put in the hands of another… I decided that it was time to think about the issue properly and not avoid it any longer. Frank. Frank was beautiful. His eyes were quite literally the definition of perfection and the way that his fringe flopped into his eyes was just… perfect. Perfect was the only word that I could think of to describe him. I became more solemn in my thoughts as I realised that I had been striving for perfection all my life through study and knowledge and Frank had mastered it in just less than 16 years. It wasn't fair. Frank wasn't especially intelligent, but that didn't seem to matter. Did this mean that I liked him in the same way as he liked me? I couldn't answer. I had no experience in this field and for once, none of the books that I had read were helping.

After about half an hour of an interesting inner debate, I decided that I would go for a walk down to the DVD rental store. "_Perhaps I could clear my head with a good horror film,"_ I mumbled to myself. Whilst putting my coat on, Mikey ventured down the stairs carrying his empty bowl on his tray.

"Where're you going?" he asked, looking me up and down.

"I'm going to get a DVD," I replied shortly, putting my keys and phone in my coat pocket and walking towards the door.

"But it's late and it's New Jersey, Gerard… Hold on, I'll come with you," Mikey shouted after me.

"Mikey I need to fucking clear my head and you're not going to help. Sorry. Bye." With that, I left the house, shouting to Mikey to lock the door behind me before the door shut.

* * *

><p>I walked at top speed down the street, heading further into town in the general direction of the store. I was trying to distract myself from all thoughts of Frank in many ways: counting the cars that passed, singing to myself in my head, counting my steps… but I was constantly distracted. Upon arrival at the store, I was immediately distracted by the immense selection of horrors. I began a new internal debate – should I get a film that I had seen or try a new one? I decided that it would be a good idea to get something new and watch it with Mikey to try and make up for our small-scale argument earlier.<p>

"Hey, Gerard," said a voice from behind me – I jumped out of my skin. I recognised the voice immediately as Rosie and turned to smile at her. She was wearing a shot dress and her long, blonde hair was curled into loose waves; she looked very pretty.

"Oh hey, Rosie. What are you going here?"

"Oh… I'm just coming back from a girls night out and I'm gonna get a nice horror film to go to sleep to." She gave me a cheeky smile – she was flirting again and it made me exceptionally uncomfortable.

"Cool. Same here, actually. I was going to try and find something that me and Mikey haven't seen yet."

"How about The Ring?" she asked, picking up a DVD off the shelf and handing it to me. I hadn't see it and I didn't think that Mikey had either, so I decided that it would be as good of a choice as anything. "It's my favourite."

"Well I'll try it then," I said, smiling at her.

"Do you want to recommend me a film?"

"Sure." I picked up the first film in the Saw series and handed it to her. "It's a bit gory, so I'm not sure if you'll like it but-"

"I love gore," she interjected, her smile still permanently fixed on her face. "I'll give it a go."

Both of us walked up to the counter, paid and left the store. I offered to call Rosie a taxi, but she declined politely. However, I insisted until she finally gave in and allowed a taxi to be called.

"I just want to make sure you get home safe. Work would be boring if you weren't there," I said as the taxi pulled up.

"That's really sweet," Rosie cooed before drawing me into a hug. "I'll see you after the holidays." She raised herself onto her tip-toes and kissed me on the cheek before stepping into the taxi and waving at me through the window. I was frozen in place. I had no idea what the fuck just happened.

I was horrified.


	12. Chapter 12

I didn't tell a soul about my encounter with Rosie as I had managed to convince myself that it meant nothing and it was just a slip up on her part… it was just fucking annoying. It was the second time that she had kissed me on the cheek, and I hadn't reacted well the first time. I had the possibility of a boyfriend on the cards and I didn't want to fuck this up in any way – this was the first relationship I would have ever engaged in if everything went as I wanted it to. Rosie was far too forward, in my opinion, and she didn't seem to be able to comprehend that I had no interest in her whatsoever… I resolved that I should confront her about this and let her know about my sexuality.

.

I didn't do much for the rest of the holidays; I just worked my days away and often carried on late into the nights which caused me to become exceptionally tired and irritable. Even my mother's return on the Thursday evening didn't spark any kind of reaction from me… I was too busy to care. She seemed far less stressed than she was before when she came back and she couldn't stop talking about how wonderful it was in Italy and how we had to go there on holiday in the summer. I listened half-heartedly and responded when I thought it was necessary, but I was constantly plagued with thoughts about Frank that were seriously messing with my head.

.

Frank. I didn't know where I was standing with that boy and Mikey hadn't mentioned it since the day after the party. I was hoping for some kind of advice from my brother or even just a few tips but instead I got nothing. In fact, I had barely seen Mikey as he seemed to constantly be at Frank's, Ray's or Bob's – but I wasn't complaining… it allowed me time to do my work in peace and quiet. However, it was Sunday morning and I had less than 5 hours until Mikey, Frank, Ray and Bob all came back to discuss what was going to happen between me and Frank. I was absolutely petrified. Frank was obviously so much more experienced at this than me, and I couldn't stop thinking about what Mikey had said day after the party. What did he mean that Frank had been hurt a lot before? I couldn't understand who would hurt such a charming and beautiful young boy.

_Young._

Exactly.

.

I paced around the house for the rest of the day, not knowing what to do with myself. I was too nervous to eat anything, I had no more work to do and the house was already immaculate due to my mother being home again. Mikey had managed to convince our mother to go out this evening while we had our discussion, before leaving to spend the day at Ray's. I was a ball of nerves and I felt like I was going to split at the seams. I could never handle suspense well at all, and I could not stand not knowing things. Throughout my life, I found that a lack of knowledge was a weakness and therefore this whole predicament was ruining me. I didn't know how this conversation was going to go down and that frightened me a lot.

.

I was in my room scanning a book aimlessly when I heard the boys enter the house. My body immediately tensed and I dropped my book on the bed, losing my page in the process; I didn't care at all. I stood up, smoothed my clothes and walked down the stairs slowly. I felt as if I was walking towards my death. Perhaps Frank had changed his mind while we had been apart. I furrowed my brow, annoyed with myself for doubting Frank.

.

I immediately changed my mind when I saw him and he gave me the biggest smile that I had ever seen. I was overwhelmed for a moment, my heart rate increasing and my eyes widening. I breathed out slowly and returned the smile, still dazed by his natural beauty. He was wearing what he normally wore – band merchandise and skinny jeans – but on him it just seemed perfect. Mikey hadn't looked at me yet and was sat practically in Ray's lap. I thought better of moaning at him as it would probably just enrage him considering I had fallen for a student… and I thought that was slightly worse than his soppy relationship with Ray.

.

"Hey, Gerard," Ray said in his bright and cheery tone, breaking the not-at-all awkward silence.

"Hey, Ray. How have you been?"

"Awesome… does that English homework still have to be in on Monday?"

"Ray!" Mikey groaned. "I haven't fucking done it. Thanks for reminding him."

"Oh my god, Mikey, you _live_ with an English teacher. Why the hell haven't you done it?" Bob said, laughing hysterically; Mikey just glared at him.

"Can we shut up about the work, please?" Mikey asked. "That's not why we're here."

"Yeah, I have some stuff to say, if that's okay, Gerard," Frank said, breaking his silence. I nodded and motioned for him to carry on talking

.

"Well I understand that if we were to get together, it would be a _really_ risky thing to do because I don't want you to lost or job or anything because of me. But also I don't think I could stand seeing you every day and not being able to think 'he's mine.' I also understand that it might be a bit awkward because I'm best friends with your brother, but I have to put up with him and Ray being all love struck so I'm sure Mikey can put up with this." Frank winked at Mikey who just threw a cushion at Frank's face; I giggled. "I know that last time you said you didn't know whether you liked me in the same way that I like you… but I'm happy to wait for you as long as it takes."

"Frank, I know how I feel," I interjected, stopping Frank's monologue. I took a deep breath and continued. "I would like to give a relationship a try as I am pretty sure that I like you in the way you want. I've had a long time to think about the situation at hand and although it's new to me and pretty fucking terrifying, I would regret it forever if we didn't give it a shot. So I guess that's all I have to say… I just hope that you still feel the same way."

.

Frank just sat there with his mouth slightly open, staring at me with sparkling eyes. I could see tears forming and I jumped up from my seat and rushed over to him, kneeling in front of the chair he was sat in.

"Frank? Did I say something wrong?" I asked, concerned as to why tears were trickling down Frank's face.

"He's happy, you fucking idiot," Mikey exclaimed.

"Kiss him!" Ray urged, before yelping when Mikey punched his arm. I lifted my hand to Frank's face and wiped away his tears before cupping his face in my hand – he leaned into my touch. I smiled at him and he smiled back shakily through his tears.

"I want to make this work," he breathed moving his head forward so his nose was almost touching mine and I could feel his warm breath on my face.

"Well let's do it," I whispered before pressing my lips to his. He opened his mouth almost immediately, giving me access to his mouth. I could feel his hand shaking when he cupped the back of my head with it, pulling me in closer. I could hear Ray wolf whistling in the background and Mikey grumbling but that didn't matter… all that mattered was Frank. I noticed that I had begun to cry as well, tears trickling down my face as I kissed him.

Eventually I pulled away, keeping my face right by Frank's.

"Why are you crying too?" Frank asked, his lip quivering. I breathed out and wiped at my face.

"Because I'm so happy." Frank drew me into a hug and I squeezed him tightly. I couldn't believe that Frank was now mine.


	13. Chapter 13

"Frank, can you wait here a second please?" I asked, just as everyone was scurrying out of the room. It was Friday period 4, and so I had a free lesson next in which I had vowed I would spend with Rosie as I had seen her very little this passing week. Frank, however, did not have a free and so I knew that I had to be quick. He stood awkwardly in front of my desk, his hands deep in his jeans pockets, while we waited for everyone else to file out of the room.

"How are you?" I asked, getting up from my desk and standing in front of him.

"Fine," he said quickly. I wasn't convinced by his response, but I let it slide. "How about you?"

"I'm okay. Why does it feel so awkward between us? I've barely spoken to you all week and you've barely spoken to me…. have I done something wrong?"

"No! No, of course not!" Frank exclaimed, his eyes widening with shock at my question. "You could never do anything wrong. It's just that I'm really on edge – I don't want you to lose your Job over me…"

"I won't! Nobody is going to find out, Frank – I promise. It's all going to be okay." I reached out and touched his arm comfortingly, wishing I could just hug him but that would be far too much of a risk. "Do you want to come over tonight? You can stay over under the guise of staying with Mikey. I'm sure that my mum won't mind if I ask her when we're done talking. " Frank giggled. "What?" I asked, pouting a little as Frank laughed at me.

"It's funny that you're an adult and you still have to ask your mum if you can have people stay over."

"Not my house – not my rules," I replied, smirking. "But I get your point. I'll text you during next lesson and if it's okay, just catch a ride home with me and Mikey. Is that okay? We'll stop at your house so you can grab your things." Frank nodded and said good bye before leaving the room, looking back and smiling at me before he walked down the corridor.

.

I sighed heavily and dragged myself down to student reception, dragging my feet and taking a longer route in order to lessen the time that I had to spend with Rosie. As always, she greeted my enthusiastically and I forced a smile, trying to keep up the façade that I was completely fine with how Rosie acted towards me.

"How are you getting along here then?" she asked, but she continued talking before I could answer. "I haven't seen you properly in ages – I hope everything's going okay."

"It's going fine! I'm really enjoying myself and all of my students are making brilliant progress."

"Awesome!" she exclaimed; I flinched at her loudness. "And how about your personal life… found a special lady yet?" I decided to seize this as an opportunity to get Rosie off my back.

"I've found a special someone," I mumbled. I watched her search for a fitting emotion, and after going through hurt, anger and rejection she settled on excitement.

"Who!"

"I can't tell you… I've not told anyone yet and we're just seeing how it's going," I said, avoiding her inquisitive gaze.

"Is she pretty? What does she look like? Do I know her?"

"It's hard to explain…" I started, but once again I was interrupted.

"Awh, never mind then. One day I can meet her, yeah?"

"Sure," I said, smiling at Rosie.

"I promise I won't tell a soul!"

"Thanks, Rosie. That's really cool of you. Now if you'll excuse me, I need to go and make a call."

.

My mother agreed that _Mikey_ could have Frank sleep over as she was going out anyway, and so I texted him the good news. Almost straight after sending it, I received a text saying "_Okidoki. I'll see you later, dude. Looking forward to tonight ;D xox_." It was Frank, of course, but I was now exceptionally confused. What did the winking face mean? Oh God, maybe Frank was expecting me to go further with him tonight. We'd only kissed a few times! My mind began ticking overtime while I pretended to listen to Rosie talk about her life and her friends – it was completely boring. I didn't know what I would do if Frank made a move on me. I could hardly say no – that would be rude. I _wanted_ to… I wanted to **so** bad, but it just all seemed a bit too risky. I didn't quite realise that being in a _relationship_ would be this hard!

.

I practically ran to the car, only pausing briefly to say goodbye to Rosie. She shouted something after me, but I was too intent on getting away from her so I didn't hear what it was and simply shouted back "okay, I'll see you soon!" I climbed into the car and started up the engine. I was grateful to be relieved of the uncomfortable atmosphere that was present every time I was in a room with Rosie, until I realised that a whole different kind of awkward was going to get into the car now. Mikey slipped into the front seat and Frank sat in the back, his leg jittering up and down in a nervous manner.

"How was school?" I asked, sarcasm ruling my voice. Frank didn't reply but Mikey began ranting about how stupid everyone in his year was.

"And then Charlie started picking on Frank again-"

"**What?**" I bellowed, turning back to look at Frank and accidently causing the car to swerve a little. Frank just look at Mikey with wide eyes

"Oh shit. I'm sorry, Frank. I didn't mean to say anything."

"Leave it, Mikey," Frank said in a flat tone, looking down in his lap and clasping his hands.

"What happened, Frank?" I asked; neither of them replied. "Can someone please tell me?" I was becoming increasingly angry.

"I'll tell you later," Frank muttered, his voice quavering a little. I returned my full attention to the road and focused on getting us home in one piece.

.

"So what happened?" I asked again, shutting the door behind me as Frank and I entered my bedroom. Mikey had agreed to give us some privacy while we spoke about this and so he was in his own room probably playing video games. Frank just sat heavily on the bed and began picking at his hoodie sleeve. I sat down carefully next to him and debated whether it would be appropriate to put my arm around him before deciding to abandon all my inhibitions and comfort Frank because he obviously needed it. "What's up, sweetheart?" Frank leaned into me and rested his head on my shoulders.

"Charlie was just being a fucking moron. He kept criticising my sexuality, and it makes me question whether being with a guy is right." I mouth dropped open.

"Frank don't you _dare_ ever think that. The only thing that's wrong is people making you feel like that! Don't ever be ashamed of yourself, because I'll never be ashamed of you and neither will Mikey or anyone else that cares about you." Frank's eyes began watering. "I'll have no tears thanks, Frank. Maybe you should go do some shit with Mikey and come back and sleep in here later – is that okay?"

"But I just want to stay here with you!" Frank grumbled, furrowing his brow a little. I laughed at his face – he looked incredibly cute.

"Yes, but my mum might get a bit suspicious if you come over to see Mikey and spend no time in his room. You just need to kind of convince her everything's okay and then you can come back." I pecked him on the lips before he stood up and left, a disappointed look on his face. I decided that in his absence I would finish all of this weekend's work so that I could relax for the rest of it.

.

Frank returned to my room at about 11:30pm carrying his backpack. He smiled at me before dropping his bag on the floor and rummaging through it, resurfacing with his pyjamas in hand.

"Do you want me to go change in the bathroom or…?" Frank asked awkwardly, his cheeks flushing slightly red.

"No, it's fine. I'll get changed in here too if you don't mind." Frank just gave a wave that I hoped meant 'not at all' and so I walked to my chest of draws and pulled out my clothed. I turned around to see Frank just wearing his boxers, tugging a navy t-shirt over his head. I blinked a few times before looking away and gulping – my mouth seemed to have dried out substantially. I hastily changed and walked across to me bed before lying down and pulling the covers over me. Frank was still stood in the middle of the room looking… well… awkward.

"Frank, you don't need me to tell you to do everything. Just get into bed." Even when Frank obeyed (after apologising profusely) he still lay as far away as possible from me. "Have I done something wrong?" He shook his head. "Well come over here then."

.

He rolled over to face me and looked straight into my eyes. I stroked his cheek bone and cheek and looked down at his lips, licking my own in the process.

"You're beautiful," I whispered. This compliment, however, was a mistake as Frank just looked away and his whole body tensed.

"I'm not."

"Oh fucking shut up," I breathed before kissing him violently. Frank was obviously caught unaware as he moaned loudly into my mouth. I didn't bother to ask him to quieten down as there was no worry about my mother hearing us and… well… I'd put up with enough sounds from Mikey's room when Ray was over so Mikey couldn't complain. I discarded all thoughts of maybe stopping and instead took the experience up a level by rolling on top of him and pressing out bodies together. Frank's hands began wandering over my body eventually resting on my waist, pulling my hips into his even harder – I took that as in invitation to grind a little.

.

The friction between us was sparking reactions all over my body. I was becoming increasingly hot and turned on. Frank kept making happy-noises in the back of his throat that weren't helping the situation in my crotch either. Suddenly, Frank put his hand on my crotch and began palming me through my pyjama bottoms and a moaned so loud that I startled myself. I had never felt this much pleasure in my life and it was hard to comprehend. I was getting harder and harder with every movement of Frank's hand until I couldn't keep my head up any more. I rested my head on Frank's shoulder and breathed into his neck, tasting the sweat on his skin.

"Do you want me to…?" Frank asked, lifting my head to look into my eyes. For a moment I didn't understand what he was asking because it felt as if my head was full of air, but then I grasped that he was asking permission to move his hand under the material of my pyjama bottoms.

"_Y-yes_," I breathed. "But you don't have to."

"I want to," he replied, not hesitating for a second as he wrapped his hand around my cock. He started with tentative, slow strokes before picking up the pace, his hand practically gliding up and down my erection. I pressed my face into the pillow, aware that the noises I was making could probably be heard pretty clearly by Mikey. It wasn't long before I came, I groaned Frank's name out into the pillow as I released onto Frank's t-shirt and the bit of his stomach that was visible. I made the mistake of collapsing onto Frank's body and therefore into my own cum – disgusting.

.

I offered to reciprocate Frank's gesture, but he declined and so we just lay and kissed for a little longer before I insisted on changing out clothes and the bed sheets. While Frank searched through my draws for a top that would fit him, I stripped the bed and took the sheets down to the kitchen where the washing machine is. On my way back to my room, I was accosted by a rather angry looking Mikey standing in his bedroom door.

"Never again," he growled before slamming his bedroom door. I sniggered to myself and returned to my room to have a good night's sleep with Frank.

.

Frank was ready to leave at around midday on the Sunday. Mikey said an awkward 'good bye' before retreating back into his room. I opened the front door to show Frank out.

"Thanks," I mumbled, rubbing the back of my neck. We were stood on the porch and the sun was glaring off the pavement outside. "I mean, thank you for last night."

"No problem," Frank replied, a huge grin playing across his lips. I wrapped my arm around his waist and drew him into a hasty good bye kiss.

"Gerard?" a voice sounded from the bottom of the path. Both Frank and I stared to see Rosie stood by her red car looking at us both in shock. I looked to Frank who was about to burst into tears.

"Fuck," I mumbled under my breath. "I'm so fucking stupid."


	14. Chapter 14

"I can explain," I started immediately, stepping away from Frank and holding my hands out; the look on Frank's face suggested that he was mildly upset by this, but he was immediately overcome by a feeling of fear. Rosie looked at each of us as if she was trying to make sense of what she had just seen.

"None of this is Gerard's fault, Rosie – I promise! It's all me. _Please_ don't tell anyone! Gerard will lose his job and you know how good of a teacher he is." Frank was practically crying - he looked so distressed.

"Maybe we should go inside and talk about this," Rosie mumbled, walking up the path and entering the house by passing in between us. She didn't look at either of us and just kept her eyes focussed on the ground, her cheeks flushing red as though she was embarrassed. I stroked Frank's cheek quickly and we exchanged a worried look before following her inside reluctantly.

.

"What's going on?" Mikey asked, walking down the stairs. "Oh shit," he said, his eyes widening when he saw Rosie sat on the sofa and Frank nearly in tears. He immediately walked over to stand by Frank who was loitering in the doorway and put his arm around him.

"Maybe Frank should go upstairs with Mikey so we can talk like adults, Gerard," Rosie suggested.

"No!" Frank protested immediately. "I'm an adult and I can handle whatever you're going to say." I shot him a worried and pleading look.

"You're not an adult, Frank, and that's exactly the problem her," she spat in response. Frank opened his mouth, gaping at Rosie for a minute before Mikey took him upstairs, a look of slight confusion on his face. I hoped that Frank would explain the whole situation to Mikey so that I didn't have to take on that task.

.

"Would you care to explain what I just saw, Gerard?" I couldn't bring myself to form a reasonable response. I could feel my anger levels rising as I began twitching, tapping my foot and shifting around in my chair uncomfortably. "Gerard you can either tell me now or I can go and tell the headmaster to talk to you about it."

"You have no right to do that," I said quietly, my entire body tensing with anger. "You wouldn't do that to me."

"I have every right to do that because what you're doing is illegal. And why wouldn't I? You said you couldn't be with me because you were with someone… I didn't realise that it was a _guy. _You chose a **guy **over me? Are you completely stupid! That's just plain ridiculous… not to mention completely and utterly wrong."

"Excuse me?" I said quietly. I had begun shaking with rage. "Who are you to judge what is right and what is wrong? Would you expect me to say that you loving a guy is _wrong_? No… because you don't think it is. How fucking dare you say that homosexuality is wrong! We are free to love who we want, and if I want to love a guy I will."

"However, it is illegal to love people that are underage," she retorted. "It's disgusting."

"The only thing that's disgusting here is your attitude." I stood up and started pacing, trying to calm myself down a little. Rosie looked a little startled by my outburst, but I wasn't going to stop now.

.

"Frank is almost 16 years old. In a few weeks he can do whatever he wants. If he wanted to drop out of school he could be with me forever. Obviously I won't let him do that, so I want him to stay in school… and I want to keep my job." I stopped and stood still, looking at Rosie completely overflowing with emotion. "Please… please just don't tell anyone. We're not acting on our feelings in public and we're not doing anything irresponsible. Only two other people know so it's not like we've told the entire world. I won't be Frank's teacher in just a few months and then it's completely fine and legal. Just give us the chance… if you were a good friend, you'd do this for me. I have never asked anything of you. Please just don't take Frankie away from me." My voice began to crack. "I've never felt like this in my life about anyone else. I was always the snobby little intelligent kid that wouldn't do anything that involved social interaction because I was too busy with my books, and no one ever made any kind of effort with me – but Frank has made an effort to get to know me, and through that he has made me see the world differently. I don't just see everything as a problem to be solved anymore… I see it as _life. _And life is to be lived. Frank has made me happy, and I've only been with him a matter of weeks."

"I don't want to be a good friend," Rosie said, standing up. She looked absolutely furious and there were tears welling up in her eyes. "I don't give a shit how much you _love_ Frank. I didn't want you as a _friend_, Gerard. I wanted you to be mine. I love you."

"You don't know what you're saying. You don't love me at all, Rosie – you don't even know me! You can't love someone you don't know."

"Really? Well I do. And you've just sealed your own fate. I shouldn't bother turning up to your job on Monday because everyone will know exactly what you're like, Gerard. Good look in your life and good look getting another job in the teaching profession. Oh, and I hope you don't go to prison because I don't think the other inmates will like a pretentious fucking bookworm. I'll show myself out. Goodbye, Gerard."

.

Rosie left and I just stood in the centre of the room completely dumbfounded. I didn't even move when Mikey and Frank came downstairs minutes later after hearing the door slam shut. I could hear Frank crying on the sofa and Mikey was shouting at me, trying to get me to move… say something… blink. But I couldn't. Everything was too much. I was completely numb. I had just lost my friend, my job and my boyfriend. I had ruined my future completely. All of those years of extensive work that I had put in to get to this stage had all been wasted, thrown away in a moment of stupidity. I could have stopped this. I could have prevented it. Then it occurred to me that I had also destroyed Frank's life. If Rosie told a lot of people then his peers were bound to find out, and I knew that Mikey, Ray and Bob could only protect him so far. I feared him being beaten up again all because of my idiocy.

This was all my fault.

* * *

><p><strong>AN** Sorry about how it's super short, but the next chapter should be pretty long. Thanks for reading! Review? Emily xox


	15. Chapter 15

"Frank, does your mum know you're gay?" I asked when I had finally unfrozen.

"Yeah… why?" Frank sniffed – Mikey had only just managed to calm him down from the hysterics he was having.

"Does she accept it?" I was making a point of ignoring Frank's questions. He nodded in response and my mind clicked into action, making millions of decisions every second. My world was crumbling in my hands and I couldn't seem to find the right information to stop it – my knowledge was fucking useless. "Okay… well I think you need to introduce me to her. I have a vague idea of a plan but I need to work on it a hell of a lot. If Mikey takes you home now, would you be able to arrange for me to come over later this afternoon? You'll need to brief her on the situation so that I don't have to waste my time explaining, but it will still take a while. Is that okay?"

"Sure, Gee. Anything. Is everything going to be okay?" he asked, walking over to me and biting his lip. I hugged him tight and stroked his hair.

"I really hope so, Frankie." I planted a quick kiss on his lips and then ushered him and Mikey out of the door before racing upstairs to grab a pen and a pad of paper.

.

After a few hours of relentless note making, expensive telephone calls and a little bit of panicking I was ready. My plan was absolutely fool proof – I prided myself on my thoroughness and hoped that it was enough to turn this situation around. After dropping Mikey a text, I headed to Frank's address with my notebook, intent on turning this negative situation into a positive. Thoughts of guilt continued to plague me though, as I had potentially fucked up Frank's future. I realised that I was speeding and immediately slowed down, shocked at myself for my lack of attention to what I was doing. Everything that I had worked for was being destroyed. If my plan worked then I would have to give up my job, my home and my family and that would destroy me. I had worked for _years_ and this had been my dream job… I had destroyed my own life.

.

I arrived at Frank's home where Mikey and Frank were sat outside on the porch.

"What's the plan then?" Mikey immediately said as I got out of the car. They both stood up and looked at me expectantly.

"Well that's what I've come to talk about, obviously. How did your mum take it, Frank?" I turned my attention to him, looking at him with sympathetic eyes.

"She was shocked, but she's a push over and she just wants her 'little boy' to be happy," Frank muttered, scuffing his shoes on the ground.

"I don't think she'll be very happy with it after I put my offer out to her," I said before following Frank and Mikey into the house.

.

"This is Gerard, mum." Frank gestured to the woman sitting in an armchair facing the blank television.

"Oh hello, Gerard. I would like to say I've heard a lot about you, but Frank only told me about the whole situation today." Franks mum smiled warmly at me and I felt awfully guilty for what I was going to do.

"Hello, Mrs Iero. I'm so sorry that we have to meet under these circumstances but it's lovely to finally meet you. I assume that Frank has briefed you on the situation at hand?" I said, rushing a little.

"Please, call me Linda sweetheart. Also, all I'm aware of is that you're in a relationship with Frank and someone has found out so there is a massive problem." I nodded. "What's your plan then?" Linda gestured for me to sit down and I complied, taking a deep breath before beginning to tell them my plan.

.

"Well the woman that found out about our relationship happens to be one of my work colleagues and she also has a large crush on me and therefore wants to destroy my career with this information. If I show up to work on Monday she will get me fired, stop me teaching in other schools and possibly get me put in jail. I have made a lot of calls this afternoon and the people that I met in England."

"Oh god, please… no," Frank interrupted, putting his head in his hand. Mikey just stared at me open mouthed.

"Frank, let me finish. One of the schools that I did work experience at in London has offered me a place as a supply teacher every Friday, and another had an opening for an English teacher every Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday. I am going to be staying with one of the girls from my course for a week until I find a flat of my own. I have a lot of money saved up, so it shouldn't take long to get myself set up. After Frank turns sixteen, I would like to invite him to move to England with me. I will search for a school that will take him and I will support him and care for him. All I am looking for is your acceptance, Mrs Iero. I understand that this is not something you can answer quickly, but I hope you do consider it. Obviously Frank has got to think about it too, but I just want you to know that I will take very good care of him."

.

Everyone sat in an awkward, stunned silence. Linda looked as if she was undergoing an internal, emotional battle, Mikey looked as if his world had come crashing down and Frank just looked very impatient, as if he knew what I wanted to do anyway.

"I want to go with him," Frank said flatly, still gripping Mikey's hand.

"But you can't go, Gerard," Mikey mumbled, staring at the floor. "What's mom going to say?"

"I'll tell her I got a better job. She'll be fine with it as long as I visit regularly… and I lived in England when I was at university."

"Gerard, are you sure that there's no other way around this?" Linda asked.

"I don't think so. Rosie is vicious… she'll do anything to hurt me because I've hurt her."

"When are you leaving?" Frank croaked.

"Early Monday morning. And then if you're allowed, you can come out any time after your birthday."

"Can Gerard stay over tonight please, mom?" Frank asked, looking at his mother hopefully.

"Sure, sweetie," she replied. "I'm going out later so I'll have a think and let you know about England in the morning.

.

I drove Mikey home so that I could pick up the things I needed to stay at Frank's. The car was silent the whole way back; Mikey just spent the entire time staring out of the window forlornly.

"We're back," I whispered, shattering the silence. Mikey jumped, being startled out of his thoughts.

"I'm going to miss you, Gerard," Mikey said in a low tone before reaching across to my seat and hugging me tightly. The gear stick was digging into my thigh and my back hurt, but I stayed hugging my brother tightly.

"I'll miss you too, Mikes. But I'm going to come back as often as possible, and you can come visit me in England."

"I'm going to lose my best friend and my brother. This is fucking awful." A single tear strayed down Mikey's cheek.

"I'm so sorry, but there's nothing I can do. You _know _how much I'm worked for this job, and I can't just give up on it. I'll tell mom when I get back tomorrow so please can you make sure she's in a pleasant mood?" Mikey nodded. "Thanks. I'll just go and grab my stuff and then I'll be off… I'll see you tomorrow, Mikey." I said, hanging my head a little. We both got out the car and shared a last hug before entering the house.

.

I had barely even set foot into Frank's house before he was hugging me, his head pressed against my chest and his fists balled up in my t-shirt.

"You okay, sweetie?" I asked, stroking his hair.

"It's my fault."

"I've told you a million times that it's not, Frank! It was my mistake." Frank wrapped his arms around my neck, clasping his hands behind my head.

"I'm going to miss you, Gee." I placed my hands on his hips.

"It's only for a couple of weeks, Frankie. It's not going to be _that _bad."

"Trust me… it will."

.

Frank reached up and pecked my lips softly, and I responded to it by dipping my head down and kissing him back. We stood for a while, kissing slowly and savouring every second of it, and how close our bodies were.

"This will be our last night together," Frank mumbled against my jaw, breaking out kiss.

"Let's not thing of it like that," I said, placing my finger under his chin and tilting his head up to look into his eyes. "Let's think about it as our _best _night together."


	16. Chapter 16

We stumbled up to Frank's room, always maintaining some form of contact. It was a hasty and clumsy but we didn't care… our only intention was to make this night as memorable as possible.

"I love you, Gee," Frank whispered in my ear as we crashed down onto his bed, Frank lying on top of me. A lump appeared in my throat and I couldn't reply for a moment; my emotions were running too high.

"I love you too, Frank and I always will." Frank sat back on his heels and grabbed the hem of his shirt, pulling it over his head. I marvelled at his stomach and traced the line of hair that trailed down to his belt buckle. After tossing the shirt to the floor, Frank leaned back down and kissed me softly, the passion so evident that it almost brought me to tears. I could see from Frank's body language and how he was touching to me how much he _wanted _this and how sad he was at the same time.

"Can I…" Frank began, gesturing to my shirt. I nodded, staring straight into his warm eyes. Frank pulled my t-shirt over my head and laughed as he threw it into the same corner as his own.

"What?" I asked, furrowing my brow.

"Your hair's funny," Frank giggled, ruffling my hair up with both his hands; his laugh made my heart swell.

"Not as funny as it will look when we're done." Frank smirked at me before popping the button of my jeans open in one deft movement.

.

I shimmied delicately out of the tight material. Frank took his jeans off, but whilst trying to kick them to the floor he lost his balance and fell forward on to my chest. Frank flushed excruciatingly red and I just smiled at him and pushed his hair back off his face. We were both now in just out boxers and I could feel myself becoming hard with anticipation, knowing what was going to happen. Frankie looked up at me through his eyelashes and grinned before pressing a few kisses to my bare chest. One of his hands was on my face and one was on my inner thigh, rubbing small circles that were making me go crazy. He moved his hand higher so that it was just entering my boxers, and simultaneously he moved his lips back up to mine to kiss me some more. I hummed a little with pleasure and just pure happiness –I was so grateful for this time with Frank.

.

The next step was to remove out boxers, and this proved far easier than taking of our jeans. Within a matter of seconds we were completely naked and we were both painfully hard. Frank sat back again and placed his hands on my hips, thumbs in the dimples on my hip bones, taking in every inch of my body. I couldn't take the tension any longer so I shifted my hips a little, making Franks crotch move on top of mine.

"_Fuck_," we both groaned in unison.

"You're so beautiful," I thought aloud, running my hands down his chest. Frank just shrugged, and before I could argue my point his hand was on my dick and he was stroking it gently.

"Oh _god," _I exclaimed, the volume of my own voice startling me. "I'm sorry… I'll try and keep it down."

"My mum's out and our neighbours can complain all they like, I won't be living here much longer. Besides… I want to hear you scream.

.

With that, Frank's wrist movements sped up drastically, expertly twisting his hand and driving me insane. I let my head fall back on Frank's pillow and gripped the sheets, swearing under my breath. I summoned all the strength within my and put my hand on Frank's, stopping the movement; I hissed a little at the loss of friction. I flipped us over in a movement that should only be possible when rehearsed many times… but I managed it. I grinned at the confused look on Frank's face.

"I'm not gonna let you do all the work," I said in a seductive tone. "I just hope this is okay." I kissed down his neck, pausing to suck on his neck and leaving a mark. I broke away, satisfied with the deep red patch of skin, and left a trail of kisses down to his crotch. I didn't mess around teasing, because I could see that he was already painfully hard – I just took him in my mouth and smiled as he moaned almost as loud as I had. I moved up and down, running my tongue over the underside of his dick all the way up to the slit. Frank's hands found their way into my hair, tugging a little and trying to restrain from thrusting up into my throat.

.

Frank pulled me off his dick, stopping the contact just like I had. He tugged me up so my face was right up close to his.

"I want you to fuck me," he half asked, half commanded.

"Are you sure, Frankie?"

"That's a fucking stupid question, Gee."

"Frank it means we'll be breaking the law again," I pointed out, not quite saying no.

"Do you think it matters anymore? No one's going to walk in; Rosie isn't just going to storm into my bedroom. I just want to feel you inside me, Gee. I want it _so bad._" Frank whined, looking straight into my eyes.

"Lube and Condoms," I said, holding out my hand. Frank flashed me the biggest smile I had ever seen him wear before searching through his a draw next to his bed and retrieving a bottle of lube and a pack of condoms.

.

I sat in between Frank's legs, getting ready to prep him.

"Ready?" I asked, lubricating up my fingers.

"Ready," Frank responded, putting a pillow over his face.

"I'm really sorry, Frankie… but this is going to hurt." I pressed my first finger into him and held it still while Frank adjusted to something being inside him. "Is that okay?"

"Yeah… it's just a bit weird," he said, voice muffled by the pillow. I moved my finger around a little before removing it and spreading a bit more lube onto my fingers. I pressed two fingers in and Frank flinched, pressing the pillow into his face a bit.

"I'm sorry, baby," I said sympathetically. I moved my fingers in a bit deeper and Frank yelped, muscles contracting around my fingers.

"Fucking hell that was good, do that again." I took the opportunity to scissor my fingers while he was still riding out a wave of pleasure; Frank squirmed underneath my touch.

"Okay… last one, sweetheart. This is going to hurt like a bitch but I promise it will be worth it." I forcibly pushed my three fingers in and winced as Frank whimpered. "I know, baby… I know." I stretched him and flexed my fingers, giving him another wave of pleasure which lessened the pain for him.

"I think we're ready," I said, taking my fingers out of Frank.

.

"I've been ready since the day I met you." I smiled at Franks and pressed a kiss to his nose. "Let's do this." I rolled on the condom and coated it with copious amounts of lube, wanting to make the process as easy for Frank as I could. I positioned myself at Frank's entrance before slowly pushing in. Frank hissed and I could see his eyes watering with the pain and it distressed me somewhat. Once I had pushed the whole way in I stayed still, waiting for Frank to give me the all clear. "Okay... you can move." I pulled out a little, slowly and gently, before pressing back in with a reasonable about of force. Frank's neck relaxed, his head flopping back on the pillow that he had returned to behind his head. I moved at an excruciatingly slow pace, just wanting to delve deep into Frank but knowing that it would hurt him a hell of a lot. Frank's face was beginning to relax and I could see the initial pain subsiding. He was so tight… so fucking _tight…_ I didn't think I would last very long, but I wanted to do this for Frank. I wanted to make him feel good. I quickened my movements, angling myself differently at every thrust and trying to find Frank's spot.

"_Oh fucking hell, Gee!" _he gasped, sucking so much air into his lungs that I thought his chest might explode. "Right th-there… right fucking there."

.

I smiled and continued fucking him, hitting his spot with almost ever thrust. The way his eye lids fluttered open and closed and the way his mouth formed a perfect o-shape with every moan would have been enough to send me over the edge alone, but I had to hold it in until Frank came. I began pumping his dick erratically, trying to speed up the process. Frank's hand flew up to my face, pushing back my hair which was dripping with sweat.

"I'm close, Gee," Frank croaked out, entangling his hand in my hair and pulling a little.

"So am I," I replied, groaning a little. "I want to see your face when you come. I want to feel you come… I want to feel your muscles clamp around me. You're so sexy, Frank. Ugh…" I stopped for a breath, not quite able to see straight.

.

Frank's moans became higher pitched, louder and longer until he screamed out my name and came all over our stomachs, the feel of his muscles contracting around me sending me over the edge too. I saw Frank's face, his eyes screwed up and his mouth wide open before I dropped my head to his chest, unable to hold it up as I rode out my orgasm. I pulled out and threw the used condom into the bin before collapsing on the bed next to Frank and kissing him softly.

"Was that okay?" I asked, self-conscious of how the whole ordeal had been for Frank.

"It was fucking amazing, Gee. Thank you," he breathed, kissing the end of my nose; I giggled.

"Good. I'm not really experienced in this field so I was hoping I was doing it right. I've read a lot of-"

"Books," Frank said, finishing my sentence for me. "Who reads books on gay sex?!"

"Someone who might have needed it in the future… and I was right. When's your mum going to be back?"

"Around 11… maybe 12. But we should probably put our clothes on just in case she comes back early. She would probably not let me go to England if she thought I was going to be getting fucked every night."

"Who says you won't be?" I smirked.

.

We both got up off the bed and retrieved out respective clothing and got dressed before turning and looking at the mess of dirty bed sheets on the bed.

"I should probably change those sheets…" Frank thought aloud. I nodded and walked out into the hallway and to the bathroom, shirt in hand, to wash down my stomach. I felt invigorated… like I could do anything I wanted. I never knew what something like that could feel like, and now I had experienced it, it just broke my heart even more that I would have to leave Frank for a while. As I sponged down my stomach I began to think about how wonderful life was going to be in England… we would be together and there would be no rules and no limitations. We wouldn't have to be so secretive and it just seemed like such a good idea… even though it had its negative aspects. My mum would be heartbroken to find out I was leaving. I would have to explain tomorrow and bear all of the tears and questions with a brave face.

.

"Star Wars or The Exorcist?" Frank asked when I re-entered his bedroom. He was holding up two DVDs and looking at me expectantly.

"Star Wars. Every time." I lay down on the bed with Frank in my arms, watching the title sequence. Frank was like a hot water bottle, still radiating the heat that he had built up during the sex. His cheeks were glowing red and he was smiling absentmindedly to himself, still glowing with happiness.

"I can't wait for England," Frank mumbled. I rested my chin on the top of his head before squeezing him tightly.

"Neither can I, Frank. It's going to be fucking amazing."


	17. Chapter 17

I stepped out of the car and took a deep breath before walking up to the glass doors that stood between me and my problem.

"Gerard," Rosie spat, grinning at me cruelly. "I could have sworn I told you not to bother coming to work today."

"I'm not coming to work – I'm coming to say goodbye. I assume you haven't told anyone about the situation yet," I said, my voice drained of emotion. There was no point in even wasting anger on Rosie… I felt nothing towards her.

"Not yet. I did say I'd only tell if you showed up. I suppose I will be able to keep my mouth shut this time, if you're leaving." The vicious smile dropped from her face. "Where are you going?"

"England. My flight leaves in two hours so I need to leave. I came to say goodbye to you, Rosie, and to tell you that you haven't won. You may have succeeded in driving me out of my home town, but you have not broken me. In fact, you've made everything so much better; I should give you my thanks, but you don't fucking deserve it. I resigned Friday evening so everything is sorted; I just have to collect my things from my classrooms. Goodbye, Rosie."

.

With that I walked out of the reception leaving Rosie staring after me, mouth open in amazement. I felt empowered… as if I had just stood up to some kind of bully. I hurried to 07 first and began collecting my bits of paper up, not wanting to leave the classrooms cluttered with my belongings for other teachers. As I was leaving room 13 Frank appeared in the doorway, flanked by Ray, Bob and Mikey.

"We'll wait out here for a minute, Frank," Bob said, pushing Frank into the room and shutting the door on us.

"Hey, Frankie…" I said quietly, placing my box full of papers on the nearest desk to me. Frank didn't even reply, he just took my face in his hands and kissed me. I could feel the tears trailing down his cheeks and streaking onto my own face, making me tear up a little myself… but I couldn't cry. I wasn't going to see Frank for a little while, so I needed him to think of me as strong until we were reunited.

"No tears," I mumbled when he broke away, resting his forehead against mine. I looked deep into his shining eyes and smiled. "You'll make me start crying."

"I'm gonna miss you, Gee," Frank squeaked.

"It's not going to be long, Frankie. And your mum said yes to England so I'll definitely be seeing you."

"Yes, but she told me I can't come until Christmas… that's a few _months_ away!" he whined.

"I know… I know… I understand that it's hard for you, Frankie, but your mum can hardly send you out to Europe if I don't have the means to provide for you. Besides, I'm going to be back over here at Christmas and then I'm taking you back to England with me. Use the time that you're here with your family and friends, because you're going to miss them when you leave." Frank nodded weakly and pressed his lips to mine once more.

"Okay… I'll try." Frank smiled at me and I smiled back, trying to ignore the breaking of my heart.

.

We opened the classroom door and stepped out. Mikey didn't even give me chance to speak before colliding into me and squeezing me tight.

"I'm going to be back at Christmas, Mikey! Everyone needs to stop acting like I'm going to be gone forever."

"I know… but I'm going to miss you. Promise you'll let me come stay with you in the summer?" He asked. "I'd love to visit England."

"Of course, Mikey – I promise. Maybe all of you guys could come out for your first holiday away from home."

"We'll miss you too Sir… I mean, Gerard," Ray added, smiling widely and holding out his hand for me to shake – I ignored it and embraced him in a double-hug with Bob.

"You guys were the best students ever!" I exclaimed. "And I'll see you all soon, but if I don't leave now I'll miss my flight. Ray, you'll look after Mikey, right?"

"Of course!"

"And Mikey… Look after Frankie for me." Mikey put an arm around his best friend and nodded reassuringly. "And remind mum to come pick up my car from the airport when she's home from work. I'll see you guys soon," I repeated before hugging Frank once more and leaving.

.

I walked out to my car and put my box of papers on the passenger side seat, noticing the piece of paper on the top. It had a sketch of London Bridge, The London Eye, the Tower of London and various other iconic places in London on it with a little note in the bottom right hand corner:

"_I expect a kiss from you in all of these places. All my love – Frank xoxo"_

I laughed and shook my head before pulling out of the car park and heading for the motor way… I was on my way to the airport to start a new life. Later, I could spend that life with someone I truly loved. Everything was good again.

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><p><strong>AN** - I'm sorry for the lack of updates, and I'm sorry this is so short, but my A-Levels are consuming my life. I do have a time table now though, and it includes a slot for fanfiction - so hopefully I'll get some regular updates up again. Thank you for reading! Only a couple more chapters left of this one... but reveiws are Always appreciated... as are promotions because I no longer have tumble and therefore have lost my means of promoting my fic. Message me if you promote and i will love you forever - Emily xoxox


	18. Chapter 18

The plane ride back to England was long and my legs ached so badly by the end of the trip, but the thought of seeing Frank again kept me smiling. I could barely keep still, shifting around awkwardly in my seat and probably annoying the people around me, but the time just would not pass quick enough for me. I repeatedly checked my hand luggage to make sure I brought all of Franks Christmas presents with me, but that just made me a little nervous.

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The house that I had managed to purchase was just on the outskirts of London. It was a small house with only two bedrooms, but we would only need one anyway. I had spent the few previous months making the house as homely as possible, decorating and buying knick-knacks that would fill the rooms. However, I knew that the house would never be a home until Frank was living there with me. I had cleared half of the wardrobe for him and half the draws in the dresser ready for all his stuff and honestly, I had been waiting since the day I got there for Frank to arrive. Everything I did made me think of him. Every pay check I received was another pay check I could use to support Frank when he moved over. I was waiting to be truly happy again.

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Upon arrival at the airport in New Jersey, I retrieved my luggage and went to stand outside, searching for my lift. That's when I spotted my brother, leaning against my car squinting at his phone. I practically ran to him, colliding into him and hugging him tight before he even looked up from his phone.

"Gee you made me jump!" Mikey exclaimed into my hood. It was dark outside and the night was cold, so I pulled out my gloves and put them on.

"Did you miss me?" I asked, smirking whilst rubbing my hands together to generate heat.

"I thought they were going to cancel your flight because of the snow… I was scared you weren't going to be here for Christmas!"

"I wouldn't miss our family Christmas for anything… I didn't even want to miss Christmas eve and that's why I'm here… granted, it is 10 o'clock in the evening, but at least I haven't missed it," I said, getting into the car. Mikey got into the passenger seat and handed me the keys.

"We didn't light the candles or anything yet," Mikey said. "Mum said we should save it for when you get here." I smiled, grateful that I would get to see my mother soon. "Are you going to see Frank now?" Mikey asked.

"Yeah… I'm going to surprise him. You didn't tell him I was going to be back home today, right?" Mikey shook his head. "Good, because I told him that I wasn't back until boxing day."

"You're going to surprise him?" I nodded. "That's really cute." I blushed a little, pulling out of the car park and heading to Frank's.

"How's it going with Ray anyway?" I asked – now it was Mikey's turn to blush.

"It's going well… we're still going very strong."

"Have you… you know…. done it yet?" I asked, staring straight ahead at the road. Mikey made a kind of whining noise and shifted in his seat.

"Gerard!" he finally squeaked out. "You can't ask that! I mean… oh my gosh… you just can't ask me that!"

"I'll take that as a yes then," I said, smiling to myself. Mikey made a noise as if he was going to protest but then let it go. I laughed. "I've missed you, Mikes."

"Did you do it before you went away?" Mikey asked, trying to sound casual.

"Did Frank not tell you?" Mikey shook his head. "Yeah, we did."

"Oh my gosh, that's so weird," Mikey said. I laughed at him and continued to drive, eventually pulling up outside Frank's house.

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I walked up to the doorway, the snow crunching under my boots, and I paused before ringing the doorbell of the Iero house. I heard the sound of someone running down the stairs and then I heard a voice.

"I'll get it!" I heard Frank shout from inside. My heart fluttered and I swayed a bit on my feet, suddenly so nervous that I couldn't breathe. "It's probably more carollers, mum, don't worry." Suddenly the door opened and I was met by the hazel eyes that I had been dreaming about for so long. There was silence for minutes as we both just stared at each other. I could feel my eyes welling up with tears and I could see Frank mentally breaking down.

"Who is it," I heard his mum call from inside.

"It's Gerard…" Frank whispered. "Gerard's back." It was then that Frank leapt out of the doorway into the snow without any shoes on, crashing into me, wrapping his legs around my waist and crying into my shoulder. "I missed you so much," he sobbed in a high pitched voice. I placed him back down on the door step and waited for him to tug on some boots before stepping back out into the snow. "Why are you back home so early?" We walked to his garden wall and brushed the snow off it before sitting down. I put my arm around his shoulder and let him cuddle into my side.

"I was always coming back today… I just wanted to surprise you." I stroked Frank's hair and he melted into my side even more. "I want to give you your presents now too because I just can't wait."

"It's not Christmas yet, Gee!" Frank exclaimed. "You _can't _open presents when it's not Christmas day!"

"Well I've changed the rules for you and now you can." Frank sat up a little and grinned at me, showing all his pearly white teeth.

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I grabbed my bag that I had placed at my feet and pulled out four presents wrapped in London-themed wrapping paper.

"You have to open this one first," I said, handing over a small kind of circular present. "I saw this in one of the shops near the airport just as I was going to board the plane, and I saw it and just knew I had to buy it for you." Frank opened the present slowly. Inside was a pumpkin tea light holder with the union jack painted on it. "They only had one left because it was still left over from Halloween, but I thought it would be perfect for you."

"Thank you, Gee!" Frank said, putting the pumpkin to one side and kissing me on the cheek. "It is perfect."

"Okay, now you have to open this one," I said, handing him a small, thin envelope. Frank opened it carefully again, making sure not to rip the contents. Inside this present was just one photo. Frank gasped and clutched it to his chest.

"Is this our room?" Frank whispered, looking at me with big, excited eyes. I nodded and smiled. "It's so perfect." It had taken me the whole time I had been in England to decorate the bedroom, and I was worried that it wouldn't have been ready for Frank's arrival. However, it was eventually finished. I had managed to find the perfect four poster bed with deep red curtains decorating it. The walls of the room were also a deep red and the furniture was black, but the bright paintings brightened up the room. "Gee I love you so much… I can't wait for this."

"I can't wait to take you home either. Everything is going to be so good in England." I handed him a third gift.

"Gee, how much have you got me?" Frank asked, taking the second envelope out of my hand and opening it. Inside was his plane ticket to England. Frank made a squeaking noise and stood up, jumping up and down. "I'm so excited!"

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"Okay, last present, Frankie," I said, giving Frank a box. "This is the most important one." Smiling at me, Frank opened the box and gasped, pulling out the set of keys. "These are the keys to our house, Frankie."

"_Our_ house?" Frank breathed, clutching the keys.

"Yep. Ours. Your mum and I have enrolled you in the local secondary school, due to start after the Christmas holidays. It's only down the road so it's within walking distance – but not the same one I work at this time." I smiled at him. "We're going to be coming back to New Jersey in each of the half terms to see our families and friends. We're going to take some of your stuff over next week when we go over to England, and your mum is going to ship the rest of your stuff over." Frank was still staring at me with tears forming in his eyes, still holding the keys tightly.

"Gerard this is the best Christmas ever…. I couldn't have imagined anything better," he whispered before leaning over and crashing into me so hard that we both fell off the wall into the snow. We turned to each other and giggled, the tips of our noses touching. It was in that moment, staring into Franks eyes in a heap of warmth and giggles in the crystal snow that I knew how good I had it. I knew right then, that my life had just begun… and it was going to be perfect.

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><p>AN: Awh finished. I hope you guys liked it! Sorry this took so long to finish. Reviews are very much appreciated :D 3 - Emily


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